It is the second anniversary of my Mum's death today and whilst I have been slightly better this year than on the same day last year I have still had a very sad day. I went to see my Dad this morning and he was asleep on the loo for most of the time I was there despite the nursing staff trying to coax him out. He did come out briefly and looked terrified but walked the length of the corridor with me before returning to the loo. I tried to remain positive. He did at least kiss me but I finally admitted defeat having been there for an hour and spent 30 seconds with him. I decided to go to my Mum's grave on my own ( I have no other family around) and cried my heart out having said a prayer or two, sung to her a read a poem. I went home and phoned a friend who persuaded me to try and visit my dad again this afternoon. It was a slightly better visit in that he was with us for most of the time and he held my hand and kissed my Mum's rings which I wear. This made my friend cry which only made me more sad as the enormity of it all hit me. Not sure what to do to cheer myself up?