TW: delusions involving sexual assault

[Jen79]

My 81 year old mother has Alzheimer’s and lives with my father independently with carers and family help. Over the past fortnight her delusions have become extremely traumatic including believing she has been raped and sexually abused in the night. We are waiting for test results to
Check for a uti and have contacted the mental health team. She is on no medication currently. We can’t seem to get any advice/support anywhere and it is truly
devastating for my mum and for us to witness. Has anyone else experienced anything like
This and is there anything anyone can suggest we can do.

 

[Grannie G]

Welcome to posting @Jen79

How awful for you all as a family. Delusions are a nightmare. We don`t know where they come from or whether they will be temporary or permanent.

A delusion of sexual abuse needs the most careful handling. If the test for a UTI comes back negative, I can only suggest you contact the support line.

Dementia Support Line

If you need dementia support, we’re here for you. Get personalised information, support and advice by calling us on 0333 150 3456.

www.alzheimers.org.uk

 

[SeaSwallow]

Oh dear @Jen79 this must be truly awful for your mum, dad and the wider family to have to deal with. If the delusions are just recent they could be caused by a UTI however delusions can be part of any form of dementia as it progresses and they can be of a violent and distressing nature.
Please keep contacting the mental health team as there are some medications that can help. I do know from experience with my husband that medication may not stop the delusions altogether.
I have attached some information which you may find useful.

Delusions, paranoia and dementia

It is common for people with dementia to experience delusions (or strongly held false beliefs), which can also take the form of paranoia. Common delusions include theft or believing loved ones are trying to harm them.

www.alzheimers.org.uk

 

[canary]

This must be terrible for everyone
There is medication to help with delusions, but I expect the mental health team want to be sure that there is no infection before prescribing anything
In the meantime Im not sure what you can do apart from just reassuring her
Sending you some (((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))

 

[yoy]

My mum had similar after moving into her care home. For a while she kept telling me that gangs of lads were getting in during the night and that she had been raped. She didn't appear to be particularly upset when telling me and eventually it died down. It later became replaced by delusions of them all being poisoned, people being abducted etc. Eventually she started getting quite aggitated (I assume frightened) and the home called the mental health team in who prescribed meds which seemed to work for her.

 

[Jen79]

My mum is terrified and leaves the house and goes to my sisters or her friends house to hide first thing in the morning. It’s truly
horrific isn’t it

 

[Jaded'n'faded]

My mum had similar after moving into her care home. For a while she kept telling me that gangs of lads were getting in during the night and that she had been raped. She didn't appear to be particularly upset when telling me and eventually it died down. It later became replaced by delusions of them all being poisoned, people being abducted etc. Eventually she started getting quite aggitated (I assume frightened) and the home called the mental health team in who prescribed meds which seemed to work for her.

I experienced very similar with my mum in her care home. Rapes, cavorting couples in her room, men coming in and masturbating, etc. And the poisonings, murders, ambulances coming to take all the dead away, fires where the place had burned down in the night and 6 fire engines called... You name it. Even the chef got sacked and they cut his legs off, poor man. Terrible place I'd put her in, huh? Like your mum, mine was not terribly bothered by these atrocities either, even when a man exploded in the corridor. ('It was all over the walls!' she told me. 'Looks clean enough now mum!' says I. 'Yes, but I've had to keep on at them all morning to clean it up! says mum )

But actually these things were easy enough to ignore (though sometimes hard to keep a straight face!). More difficult was when she started telling me her mum used to go out drinking and bring men home and she (my mum) had to go with them... I really hope this was a delusion and not a real memory. No way to know of course

 

[canary]

Ive just had a thought. Is she watching stuff on TV in the evening that might be triggering the delusions?
Mum thought that things she saw on TV were actually happening to her and in her home

 

[Jen79]

Ive just had a thought. Is she watching stuff on TV in the evening that might be triggering the delusions?
Mum thought that things she saw on TV were actually happening to her and in her home

This is something we have wondered but she doesn’t really watch tv that much as she doesn’t have the concentration and is always up and down like a yo-yo never settling for long unless Andre Rieu is on! In the past she liked reading crime thrillers and watching crime dramas so it could be this. Her descriptions are so vivid and real to her though. But seem to be forgotten after a while until
The next time.

 

[Diane1941]

Hi! I just joined this site because I was trying to find other people who were going through this!

My mom has had spells where she gets paranoid delusions. People are stealing from her, trying to kill her, etc. This last one that happened on Easter was the worst one yet. She's been in her assisted living place since Dec. She was pretty happy (as much as she can be happy). Just last week she was telling me it was a really nice place.

Easter morning she calls me and tells me she is in trouble and we need to contact my lawyer sister for legal advice. According to her, the facility drugged her and all the male workers were partying in her room and had sex with her and now everyone is talking about her and blaming her and the men are getting away with it. She had defaced the blinds in her room (she wrote ******* on them) but she said it was one of the men who had done it.

She told the waitress at her place this story so now the director is asking me to take her to get a checkup to make sure she doesn't have a uti, etc.

My mom is now telling me she hates this place and needs to move out asap. We already moved her twice in the past 6 months. I'm not moving her again. She has always been paranoid and negative. I feel like her dementia has made her worse. I'm so over her craziness. Btw, there are only 2 men who work in her assisted living place. One of them is a waiter in the cafeteria and the other is head of maintenance. The caregivers are all women, so there is no way this scenario she is sure that happened really happened.

I took her to my place on Easter to spend two nights and she never said a word about her "rape" while she was here. It was only when we took her back to her place she started talking about it again and telling everyone she had to get out of there.

 

[SeaSwallow]

Hello @Diane1941 and welcome to the Dementia Support Forum. This must be so distressing for you and also for your mom. I would suggest that you get your mom checked out for any infections and also ask her doctor for a medication review to see if any new medications might calm the delusions down. They really are difficult to deal with and to listen to.
I have attached some information on delusions which might help you.

Delusions, paranoia and dementia

It is common for people with dementia to experience delusions (or strongly held false beliefs), which can also take the form of paranoia. Common delusions include theft or believing loved ones are trying to harm them.

www.alzheimers.org.uk