I have posted on here a couple of times before. My mum is 60 and was diagnosed with Alzheimers last year. Since then she had deteriorated rapidly. She is now very very confused and has little grasp of what is going on and there is nothing of her old self left. It is really heartbreaking to see. I have been having a really hard time trying to accept it. She is cared for currently by my stepfather who until this all happened , I have never had a close relationship with which makes it all the more complicated. I live almost 4 hour drive away, have 2 small children, am pregnant and my husband works long hours so am not in a position to offer a great deal of practical help. My dilemma is that recently my husbands job has been very unstable and we have been quite concerned about what on earth we will do if he gets made redundant. He has now been possibly been offered a job abroad which would be a fantastic opportunity for him and for the whole family. We have lived abroad before we had children and both loved the opportunity to do so. It is the kind of opportunity that would probably mean we were able to provide a lot more for our family. it is unlikely to come along again. If my mum was not ill, we would jump at the chance but I just don't know if I can do it. I am so torn as in some wasy I feel I am unable to do very much even being in the same country and that I have to make the best decisons for my family. I don't want to abandon my Mum and would always want to do whatever I could for her but I would have to accept that I would not be able to come home all that often. Please I would love other people's opinions on this as I just feel very confused and really guilty for even thinking about it.