told mam has alzheimers today. help
- Thread starter spuddle
- Start date
I don't think anyone doubts it. In fact I would be surprised if it isn't thousands.
That doesn't alter the fact that there are many, many more who are not as lucky. And before anyone explodes, no-one is lucky to have dementia. But those that have it and are still able to live comparatively 'normally' are lucky when compared with the majority who can't live 'normally' at all.
Having lived in a family of dementia its recognizing or admitting you have it my dad was the worst of the family he obviously knew he had problems and told everyone he was punch drunk because he was a boxer for 30 years and possibly it didn’t help my mum never admitted to having dementia even after diagnoses my diagnoses came out of blue and I was a pain in the ass for a few years not because I was worried about dementia because having live with family members I knew it wouldn't become a problem for me for another 25 or 30 years or more ( its been over 15 now ) but I was annoyed because dementia diagnoses brings the DVLA rubbish and not be allowed to have a gun licence utter rubbish But that’s governments rules so basically it depends what stage you get dignosed and how long you live after diagnoses that's up to each individual
Hi Tony. I think your post epitomises the fact that people diagnosed with any illness, are so different from each other. It's good that you and your group members, and probably thousands of others, can still live such full lives, without the need of assistance from others.
But unfortunately, there are equally thousands who are very different. Who cannot drive a vehicle, because they have lost all awareness of danger, and the ability to apply the brakes, who are doubly incontinent, who are violent, who don't recognise their loved ones, and speak to them with hatred in their voices.
Those who, like me, care for a spouse, who are bone-weary with the endless treadmill of giving their undivided attention to their loved one. Who are probably not spring chickens themselves, but are willing to give every iota of energy to helping their spouses, and consequently ignoring their own health problems.
The word "illness" is an umbrella that can cover everything from the common cold to cancer. Similarly the word "dementia" can apply to folk who, unless you were made aware of it, give no impression whatsoever of having a thing wrong with them. But it can also apply to those at the other end of the spectrum.
Indeed you, and many others who have dementia and post on here, are eloquent, and able to express your thoughts and feelings with clarity. My husband for example, doesn't know how to turn on the light, let alone the computer! I wish you well.
Hi Tony. I think your post epitomises the fact that people diagnosed with any illness, are so different from each other. It's good that you and your group members, and probably thousands of others, can still live such full lives, without the need of assistance from others.
But unfortunately, there are equally thousands who are very different. Who cannot drive a vehicle, because they have lost all awareness of danger, and the ability to apply the brakes, who are doubly incontinent, who are violent, who don't recognise their loved ones, and speak to them with hatred in their voices.
Those who, like me, care for a spouse, who are bone-weary with the endless treadmill of giving their undivided attention to their loved one. Who are probably not spring chickens themselves, but are willing to give every iota of energy to helping their spouses, and consequently ignoring their own health problems.
The word "illness" is an umbrella that can cover everything from the common cold to cancer. Similarly the word "dementia" can apply to folk who, unless you were made aware of it, give no impression whatsoever of having a thing wrong with them. But it can also apply to those at the other end of the spectrum.
Indeed you, and many others who have dementia and post on here, are eloquent, and able to express your thoughts and feelings with clarity. My husband for example, doesn't know how to turn on the light, let alone the computer! I wish you well.
Hi Scarlett123 yes I understand exactly what you're saying however the point I try to make I first recognized my Dad had memory problems when he was about 62 years of age this 1971 when was struggling to do things that he had done for years , dementia wasn’t talked about much back then my mum and brother & sister didn’t take to much notice of it he slowly declined over the next 20 years and was in his Eighties before the G.P said he had Alzheimer’s to us this was a new word (could have been anything ) any way he got to the stage he didn’t know any family member and eventually died of cancer , obviously we all get a diagnoses when at different stages of the illness , but the point I try to make is there is a starting point and an end point the period in between could 1 or 2 years or 30 to 35 years hopefully for me it’s the latter because come November it will 16 years since my diagnoses to add I didn’t give up work I continued working until the retirement age 65 I do understand people are frightened and worry when they hear Dementia because they don’t hear the brighter side I don’t reply to sport with anyone’s feeling just telling as a person with dementia Hopefully its explained ok I’m not best with words ( my excuse is Dementia )
Cheers Tony xx
Thank you Scarlett123. I revel in moments like this when OH has just dropped into a deep sleep, watching the tennis, and I can relax by coming on TP and just "being me" for five minutes! X
Hi Spuddle,having the awareness that your mum has got Alzheimer is a life changing experience.I was be friending a lady in a previous experience and I discovered with her a rich world based on memories of the past as childhood,adolescence, friends, early adulthood.Also she enjoyed to be helpful as describing what she was doing when she was a nurse and the enjoyment she found in doing her job properly.I think the most important thing is keep on talking with your mum, a good conversation and involvement in small things around her house can be useful.Some tips are: ask her to make a cup of tea or folding some clothes to keep away in the wardrobe or look at old pictures of her in different events.Let me know then how is going.Take care
oh my goodness.. rainbow dash.. you take the words out of my mouth. mum is such valuable lady ( a very young 81 year old).a younger friend of mine (in her 60;s) has been told by doc to try and have more social life. . maybe I can do something with them together... as you say .. maybe just a cuppa and photos or something... as you say, I have kept mum busy today helping me to fold my laundry and stuff. thank you x
diagnoses
hello spuddle
not sure if this is the way of doing this and sorry if its not the rite ethicate, but here goes, we to found out this week that our dad had this disease and i have been so emotional in private it hurts .. i empathize with your comments and hope that the journey ahead is not to disturbing .. thanks to these friends here i think we should muddle through..
hello spuddle
not sure if this is the way of doing this and sorry if its not the rite ethicate, but here goes, we to found out this week that our dad had this disease and i have been so emotional in private it hurts .. i empathize with your comments and hope that the journey ahead is not to disturbing .. thanks to these friends here i think we should muddle through..
For Spuddle and Engineerman. I am in that sad place too at present. It will pass I know, so I am sending loving thoughts to you both in the hope that you find a way to cope very soon. X
