Well our first day of the Eid holiday (yesterday) wasn’t too bad although I did get rather confused when so many people kept coming into the house and I had to keep shaking hands with everyone and trying to wish them a Selamat Hari Raya Idul Fitri ‘Happy Eid’ ‘EID Mubarak’ in the correct Arabic and Indonesian which then made me stammer the words so much that I found it best not to say to much in Indonesian or Arabic and instead just said (and the same to you)
Altogether it was an extremely hectic day with so many visitors coming and going which must have been well over 100 throughout the day and at one point there was about 20 adults and children in our house all at one time with everyone trying to talk at the same time and children crying so I seemed to be on edge and agitated all the time not knowing what way to turn with my mind constantly going in circles, when I looked at the different visitors all I kept thinking was ‘who are you, what’s your name’ as I have no memory of you, people were just mere images before my eyes without any recollection…
At one point Sumi had to take me into the bedroom for a short rest as I was loosing my sense of equilibrium, she sat me on the bed and cradled me in her arms whilst soothing my hands and nape and whispering (don’t worry my love just take a few minutes rest), I tried to watch the TV but my mind could not comprehend what was being spoken or concentrate on the programs as my vision was distorted from the images on the screen… I said to Sumi (is this the way it’s always going to be, will I just drift into a total oblivion without me realizing it, and what of you my love who will take care of you) maybe I shouldn’t have said that as then she burst into tears! This illness is so, so cruel and yields no remorse!
By 5pm as the harsh sun started to drop towards the horizon I was absolutely exhausted both physically and mentally.
Then yesterday afternoon my stepdaughter Yuni, Son-in-law Hendra, and granddaughter Fira left to visit Hendra’s mother and his brother’s and sister’s in ‘Madura’ (Another province) and wont be back home until next Sunday so at the moment the house is very quiet and we only have Sumi’s niece Melatie for company and to make me laugh, I know they have only been gone one day but Sumi and I are already missing Fira even though the little terror has me going in circles and at times making me extremely anxious and agitated… but I said to Sumi this morning even though we will miss Fira, Yuni and Hendra very much we should take it as a time for both of us to have some time together, switch off and relax…
Maybe many other sufferers of this illness are the same as me in the fact that they desperately love the grandchildren but can now only take them in short periods.
Altogether it was an extremely hectic day with so many visitors coming and going which must have been well over 100 throughout the day and at one point there was about 20 adults and children in our house all at one time with everyone trying to talk at the same time and children crying so I seemed to be on edge and agitated all the time not knowing what way to turn with my mind constantly going in circles, when I looked at the different visitors all I kept thinking was ‘who are you, what’s your name’ as I have no memory of you, people were just mere images before my eyes without any recollection…
At one point Sumi had to take me into the bedroom for a short rest as I was loosing my sense of equilibrium, she sat me on the bed and cradled me in her arms whilst soothing my hands and nape and whispering (don’t worry my love just take a few minutes rest), I tried to watch the TV but my mind could not comprehend what was being spoken or concentrate on the programs as my vision was distorted from the images on the screen… I said to Sumi (is this the way it’s always going to be, will I just drift into a total oblivion without me realizing it, and what of you my love who will take care of you) maybe I shouldn’t have said that as then she burst into tears! This illness is so, so cruel and yields no remorse!
By 5pm as the harsh sun started to drop towards the horizon I was absolutely exhausted both physically and mentally.
Then yesterday afternoon my stepdaughter Yuni, Son-in-law Hendra, and granddaughter Fira left to visit Hendra’s mother and his brother’s and sister’s in ‘Madura’ (Another province) and wont be back home until next Sunday so at the moment the house is very quiet and we only have Sumi’s niece Melatie for company and to make me laugh, I know they have only been gone one day but Sumi and I are already missing Fira even though the little terror has me going in circles and at times making me extremely anxious and agitated… but I said to Sumi this morning even though we will miss Fira, Yuni and Hendra very much we should take it as a time for both of us to have some time together, switch off and relax…
Maybe many other sufferers of this illness are the same as me in the fact that they desperately love the grandchildren but can now only take them in short periods.
Last edited:
