Hard to watch. Harder to live with. The disintegration of a person as your loved ones watch helplessly. It is horrible. It is fighteningly costly to the mental and physical health of those affected, their carers and their family. In my opinion honesty is essential to tackle this disease. There was a time when people would not talk about cancer and HIV,it was so scary. But now there is vast research and treatment. We need a cure, of course we do, and in the meantime we need to stand together as PWD, their carers and loved ones hand in hand with the next generation to see the scale of the challenge and tackle it.
The Long Goodbye: our new advertising campaign
- Thread starter HarrietD
- Start date
- Status
Well it made me cry as for a long time last year my husband would ask me what relative I was to him and no longer remembered our children. He has stabilised a bit since.
The trouble is it will resonate with all of us who care for PWD but does it cut through with others. Will there ever be a government who will not look away and not downgrade dementia to a social problem.
My husband doesn't get CHC and I didn't expect him to as on a good day he is fairly high functioning but I look at your CHC threads and it just feels the assessors only remit is not to pay it.
I worked as a Nurse with people with HIV/AIDS in the 1990's and the lobbying turned that around so perhaps it can be done.
The trouble is it will resonate with all of us who care for PWD but does it cut through with others. Will there ever be a government who will not look away and not downgrade dementia to a social problem.
My husband doesn't get CHC and I didn't expect him to as on a good day he is fairly high functioning but I look at your CHC threads and it just feels the assessors only remit is not to pay it.
I worked as a Nurse with people with HIV/AIDS in the 1990's and the lobbying turned that around so perhaps it can be done.
Yes, it a powerful message, because all full times carers know the situation, but don't want to think too much about the future.
Yes it's sad, but dementia is appalling.
It's a useful tool to try and explain, without the nasty side being shown.
No advert can really get across to someone who isn't a full time emotional investor in the family suffering on a daily basis what is the reality of the pain, hurt, helplessness, the everyday reminder through things like non-recognition, incontinence, etc etc.
When a diagnosis is given the doctor and/or nurse never say that the PWD has a terminal illness and I think they should say this to the family, but not necessarily to the PWD who is in shock (as well may be the family too).
Too many people do not fully understand the illness, the living hell that awaits. Nearly all the info and adverts never seem to be that bad. They lie, and mention living well with dementia. Dementia eats the sufferer and the family bit by bit - there is NO living well with a terminal illness, just an attitude to help the acceptability.
Unfortunately for me, I thought too much about it. I had to have counselling for anticipatory grief. It helped a bit, but doesn't take away the knowing what's going to happen. You can never un-know it.
Yes it's sad, but dementia is appalling.
It's a useful tool to try and explain, without the nasty side being shown.
No advert can really get across to someone who isn't a full time emotional investor in the family suffering on a daily basis what is the reality of the pain, hurt, helplessness, the everyday reminder through things like non-recognition, incontinence, etc etc.
When a diagnosis is given the doctor and/or nurse never say that the PWD has a terminal illness and I think they should say this to the family, but not necessarily to the PWD who is in shock (as well may be the family too).
Too many people do not fully understand the illness, the living hell that awaits. Nearly all the info and adverts never seem to be that bad. They lie, and mention living well with dementia. Dementia eats the sufferer and the family bit by bit - there is NO living well with a terminal illness, just an attitude to help the acceptability.
Unfortunately for me, I thought too much about it. I had to have counselling for anticipatory grief. It helped a bit, but doesn't take away the knowing what's going to happen. You can never un-know it.
Yes it's one of my worries but how do we get the message to the world otherwise?
he wasnt unduly upset but just asked the question. i answered it in a sympathetic way. he has COPD which wont get better either which he knows so i suppose you just have to deal with it as it comes up.
It's not just the PWD that dies a little at a time. As a sole 24/7 carer I died over and over as the Alz Dem progressed. I'm still dead inside.
I think the wider general public need to know exactly as it is otherwise they will never agree or accept the extra pennies on the income tax to pay for the care bill. . It's only a couple of years ago that an increase in national insurance was being introduced and ring fenced for social care reform.. In the last two budgets the chancellor has reduced national insurance. . Society needs to understand why there is a need for the extra taxation. I'm sure they would agree if they really knew how devastating this illness is and how many families it affects.
In over ten years of caring, I have yet to have the experience of these sort of goodbyes. My husband is ever so slowly getting worse in both his heart condition and in his dementia.
I thought it was sad but in all those ‘goodbyes’ all the video clip fillers showed happy families, all having fun apart from a couple of glimpses of a vacant mum towards the end.
This ad glosses over the sheer awfulness that families experience while caring and I think though it conveys the grief, it completely misses the mark.
I thought it was sad but in all those ‘goodbyes’ all the video clip fillers showed happy families, all having fun apart from a couple of glimpses of a vacant mum towards the end.
This ad glosses over the sheer awfulness that families experience while caring and I think though it conveys the grief, it completely misses the mark.
I think it’s a really hard balancing act. It is SO tough being a carer. When an ad shows how tough, rightly there is concern about how depressing and hopeless the depiction. As already mentioned if aggression by PWD was shown or incontinence it would be realistic to the lived experience of many but devastating to the newly diagnosed and their families.
I think when viewing material of this kind it is good to ask who the ad is intended for?
Not us for sure we get it
I think if the general public think of death at all , I think the image is of a terminal cancer with plenty of hospice care and Mc Milan nurses (as if)
The idea of checking out of this life incrementally with dementia doesn’t exist in popular imagination. Awareness raising is needed
Dementia charities do great work , they have to fund raise it’s a fact of life
The advert won’t upset my mum as there is ‘nothing wrong with her’
as for me……
My personal journal is harder hitting
I think when viewing material of this kind it is good to ask who the ad is intended for?
Not us for sure we get it
I think if the general public think of death at all , I think the image is of a terminal cancer with plenty of hospice care and Mc Milan nurses (as if)
The idea of checking out of this life incrementally with dementia doesn’t exist in popular imagination. Awareness raising is needed
Dementia charities do great work , they have to fund raise it’s a fact of life
The advert won’t upset my mum as there is ‘nothing wrong with her’
as for me……
My personal journal is harder hitting
"The advert won’t upset my mum as there is ‘nothing wrong with her’
as for me……
My personal journal is harder hitting"
I agree, my OH thinks there's nothing wrong with him. My experience is harder too.
I really feel that society needs to understand this illness. As I've already commented,they won't be prepared to have increased taxation for the care reform if they don't.
As we approach a general election ,in my opinion, charities need to educate both the electorate and the candidates for parliament.
Society has to decide what they want but can only decide if they know what they need.
as for me……
My personal journal is harder hitting"
I agree, my OH thinks there's nothing wrong with him. My experience is harder too.
I really feel that society needs to understand this illness. As I've already commented,they won't be prepared to have increased taxation for the care reform if they don't.
As we approach a general election ,in my opinion, charities need to educate both the electorate and the candidates for parliament.
Society has to decide what they want but can only decide if they know what they need.
Maybe the younger ones will vote if there's a campaign aimed at their pocket. Pay a penny or two on tax or lose your inheritance to care fees. 🤣🤣
Sorry for being flippant but if they don't understand the illness they can't become passionate about change
I don’t see the point of this advert. Those who know know. Those who don’t choose not to. This will change nothing. The Alzheimer’s Society would serve people with dementia better by more effective campaigning on the impact of health and social care cuts. That might just make a difference but this, sorry no.
I found the video both moving and distressing, but it is what is needed. It could perhaps be more hard hitting but the juxtaposition of how things were when the mother was young and the way things changed does portray some of the reality of dementia.
I am so glad that - living well with dementia - has taken a back seat.
I am so glad that - living well with dementia - has taken a back seat.
Interesting comments @Bettusboo. One would hope that the advert does help to raise the real issues amongst people who currently don't or won't get it . As for 'effective campaigning', if you have some good ideas on how to do this perhaps sharing them here or with the Alzheimer's Society would help to make progress.
This advert has come a long way from previous ones that were all about living well and sometimes underplayed the issues. Living well is important, but the reality is that it is rarely sustainable as dementia becomes more advanced.
This advert has come a long way from previous ones that were all about living well and sometimes underplayed the issues. Living well is important, but the reality is that it is rarely sustainable as dementia becomes more advanced.
Because very few people with dementia do live well with it, nor do their carers. Some may do in the early stages but you only have to read the comments on this forum to realise that living well with dementia is a pipe dream for most.
When I lived in UK, I was a little shocked how many people didn’t bother to vote in elections and that never seemed to value their vote.
I have to wonder if with ads like this one, is it a case of once seen, don’t want to see it again?
I have done already. These adverts may help fundraising for the Alzheimer’s Society but I don’t believe it will help with the things that will make a real difference to our lives. It’s like all the mental health awareness done by royals against a backdrop of mental health services being decimated. This sort of awareness raising changes nothing. I would like people to be able to live better with dementia and the most tangible way of achieving this will be through drastic improvements in health and social care and organisations like the Alzheimer’s Society speaking up much more loudly and publicly about this. We will have to agree to disagree on this.
They would live a lot better with it with better services, better trained carers supporting them and better health and social care.
- Status
