Moved my Dad to his 3rd home since 5th ay last Friday. It was a total nightmare as many of you will have read. On the Saturday he did not get up at all and did not leave his room. On Sunday when I went to pick him up he was not in his room. Marvellous I thought. He was having a coffe in the dining room. Hooray hooray but no. Since then he has not got up at all during the day and is spending the nights awake. I went today to try and get him to have a shower. He has not had one for 5 weeks.
When I arrived at 11.30am he had not had his breakfast and the one member of staff that I eventually found said that he was asleep. I went to his room and sure enough he was in bed. I instructed the carer to get him some breakfast flung the curtains open and eventually got him up. He had mismatching pyjamas on, the bottoms of which were not only the wrong way round but were stained. The bed sheet alaso needed changing. He eventually put his dressing gown on after about an hour coaxing him and we went to the shower room. When he got there he just panicked and went straight back to his room. he then locked himself in the toilet for a bit. When he emerged despite me standing in the way for a while he was insistent on getting back into bed.
Finally after trying all sorts I just gave up. He fell asleep and I went home and cried. What have I done to him? He is safe, but not clean and not eating regularly and they are so worried about letting him settle in it seems to me that they are just letting him get his body clock totally around the wrong way and he is therefore interacting less tha he was previously. I feel totally hopeless. If this does not work I have run out of alternatives, but I was far from impressed by what I saw today.
I will have to say something, but I fear that I cannot be too forthright in case they just throw him out again. He is a sweet affectionate man who is unwell. Why will no one help him? He is a big strong man but would not hurt a flea. I feel so down I keep crying again today. I am totally worn out.
When I arrived at 11.30am he had not had his breakfast and the one member of staff that I eventually found said that he was asleep. I went to his room and sure enough he was in bed. I instructed the carer to get him some breakfast flung the curtains open and eventually got him up. He had mismatching pyjamas on, the bottoms of which were not only the wrong way round but were stained. The bed sheet alaso needed changing. He eventually put his dressing gown on after about an hour coaxing him and we went to the shower room. When he got there he just panicked and went straight back to his room. he then locked himself in the toilet for a bit. When he emerged despite me standing in the way for a while he was insistent on getting back into bed.
Finally after trying all sorts I just gave up. He fell asleep and I went home and cried. What have I done to him? He is safe, but not clean and not eating regularly and they are so worried about letting him settle in it seems to me that they are just letting him get his body clock totally around the wrong way and he is therefore interacting less tha he was previously. I feel totally hopeless. If this does not work I have run out of alternatives, but I was far from impressed by what I saw today.
I will have to say something, but I fear that I cannot be too forthright in case they just throw him out again. He is a sweet affectionate man who is unwell. Why will no one help him? He is a big strong man but would not hurt a flea. I feel so down I keep crying again today. I am totally worn out.
