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Teeth. Change. Chewing. Noise. Stress.

SeismicPenguin

Registered User
Feb 28, 2018
24
0
Scotland
I am hunched over my phone furiously typing this while I sit 'watching' the TV with my mother. We had a fight about 30 mins ago, because she is blaming me for getting a new TV that she "cant see" properly without any consultation. Every day now I have to listen to how she doesnt like this TV. Fact is, we discussed it repeatedly and agreed that we would have to replace the TV because the channels kept having to be reinstalled every day or two. But she doesn't remember. I hate this illness.

Now, in the wake of the argument (and after refusing my offer to put her old TV back), she has reverted to LOUDLY SUCKING HER TEETH. I cant stand it. I feel like killing either her or myself, probably mostly the latter. That would teach my (rarely present) siblings what it is LIKE to live with this illness day in and day out. (It is not CONVENIENT for them to give me a weeks break at a time of my choosing, so maybe they would like to take on the care role full time? Hmm, I thought not, probably would be too inconvenient. Nothing about Alzheimers is frigging convenient.)

Anyway I just needed to sound off because the 24/7 teeth sucking gets on my nerves more than I would have thought possible and I haven't yet found a way of coping - it started just after Christmas. Even the TV blaring at a volume to make your ears bleed does not come close to the stress induced by the loud lip smacking sights and sounds of constant chewing of face.

Thanks for listening!!

PS sorry, I think I have posted this in the wrong bit of the forum - should have been in the "i care for someone with dementia" section. Not finding the site very easy to navigate using a mobile phone!
 
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canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
15,721
0
South coast
Ooh, unpleasant.....

Laptop/tablet with earphones?

Edit to say that this is for you - to block out the noise of the TV and so that you dont have to listen to the chewing/sucking noises
 
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Tin

Registered User
May 18, 2014
4,824
0
UK
I know the little things can drive you up the wall and one of those things for me was mum sniffing all the time, I had to remove myself to my bedroom to get away from it. Only a suggestion, but have you thought of removing the batteries from the remote control? if that is what she is using to turn up the volume and of course hiding all the spare ones. If it is a habit that has just become ingrained, may be removing the batteries you can change this.
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
2,760
0
Hand scratching, I have had it all night. I know it's the illness but it drives me nuts. I have given him the hand cream and that was worse. He spent ten minutes rubbing it in then went straight back to the scratching again.
The obsession with having the windows closed. I managed to keep them open for an hour then I went to the bathroom. I was only gone two minutes and he had shut all the windows and closed the blinds. It is so hot. Grrrr
 

Philbo

Registered User
Feb 28, 2017
849
0
Kent
It's weird just how much the "little" things grate so much??

With my wife (PWD), it's mainly centred around her dentures:eek:. She is constantly sort of sucking on them, which drives me nuts. To be fair, she tended to do this long before the dementia reared its ugly head! She has always bitten her nails and I used to moan about the irritating noises back then, which she maintained she couldn't stop herself from doing (cue increase in TV volume).:mad:

The latest torment is due to her constantly taking the top dentures out - I guess as they have become somewhat loose, they are probably irritating her in some way - who knows! She even took them out in the pub at the weekend:rolleyes: - luckily, our friends are really understanding and carried on as normal.

My wife would have been mortified, as pre-dementia, she was very secretive about having to wear dentures. So as well as me being worried that she will soon stop wearing them altogether, I am sad that without them, she looks so much older than her 67 years - something she would have hated. The relentless stripping away of her dignity is heartbreaking.

Phil
 

Pipeth

Registered User
Jan 13, 2018
134
0
Northamptonshire
Ooh, unpleasant.....

Laptop/tablet with earphones?

Edit to say that this is for you - to block out the noise of the TV and so that you dont have to listen to the chewing/sucking noises
Yes Canary, earphones and radio and earplugs have saved me many times from blowing a short fuse. I sleep with earplugs every night I can still hear him if he speaks to me and wake at the slightest movement, but it cut out the small annoying sounds OH makes that stops me getting off to sleep, as Philbo says those little things that grate so much. OH, has started saying 'Oh! dear' all day long to him self, I have stopped responding to it by asking whats wrong, because he never gives a reason for it, I just try to ignore it if there isn't an obvious reason for and distract him.
 

SeismicPenguin

Registered User
Feb 28, 2018
24
0
Scotland
It's weird just how much the "little" things grate so much??

With my wife (PWD), it's mainly centred around her dentures:eek:. She is constantly sort of sucking on them, which drives me nuts. To be fair, she tended to do this long before the dementia reared its ugly head! She has always bitten her nails and I used to moan about the irritating noises back then, which she maintained she couldn't stop herself from doing (cue increase in TV volume).:mad:

The latest torment is due to her constantly taking the top dentures out - I guess as they have become somewhat loose, they are probably irritating her in some way - who knows! She even took them out in the pub at the weekend:rolleyes: - luckily, our friends are really understanding and carried on as normal.

My wife would have been mortified, as pre-dementia, she was very secretive about having to wear dentures. So as well as me being worried that she will soon stop wearing them altogether, I am sad that without them, she looks so much older than her 67 years - something she would have hated. The relentless stripping away of her dignity is heartbreaking.

Phil
 

SeismicPenguin

Registered User
Feb 28, 2018
24
0
Scotland
That is so sad, it must be even harder to witness the impact of this hideous illness on a spouse. My mum is 92 and it seems to be the dentures that are the problem with her, too. The medics tell me there's no connection with the constant chewing and the dementia, but I don't believe that for one minute - once upon a time she would have hated to be seen in public constantly chewing on her teeth. As you say, the loss of dignity is so sad
 

SeismicPenguin

Registered User
Feb 28, 2018
24
0
Scotland
Ooh, unpleasant.....

Laptop/tablet with earphones?

Edit to say that this is for you - to block out the noise of the TV and so that you dont have to listen to the chewing/sucking noises


Great idea - seems so anti-social but so is teeth sucking- I will try it! The TV volume is less antisocial because she wears hearing aids and couldn't adapt to using the loop system so she does need the volume high.
Oh yes siblings that don't want to know. Given up with that.
I feel your pain!
 

Amethyst59

Registered User
Jul 3, 2017
5,777
0
Kent
Sorry, you may have thought of this...but maybe a visit to the dentist? I’m wondering if her teeth don’t feel ‘secure’ so she is sucking on them? And did she have a change in medication? This just stirred some old memories from uni, (studying psychology);that some drugs caused patients to constantly move their mouths or ‘chew’.
 

SeismicPenguin

Registered User
Feb 28, 2018
24
0
Scotland
Thanks Amethyst - dentist just laughed when I asked him. Dementia nurse had no suggestions. Everyone seems to just think I should get over being annoyed. They should try my shoes for 24 hours then they might take it more seriously!

No change in meds either, alas. I suspect it is just a stage. Interestingly, when she picks at her skin (has done it for years on one hand but less now than previusky) she does not do the chewing thing. The picking irritates me too, but not a patch on the teeth thing!!!
 

ksawalich

New member
Sep 19, 2021
1
0
I am hunched over my phone furiously typing this while I sit 'watching' the TV with my mother. We had a fight about 30 mins ago, because she is blaming me for getting a new TV that she "cant see" properly without any consultation. Every day now I have to listen to how she doesnt like this TV. Fact is, we discussed it repeatedly and agreed that we would have to replace the TV because the channels kept having to be reinstalled every day or two. But she doesn't remember. I hate this illness.

Now, in the wake of the argument (and after refusing my offer to put her old TV back), she has reverted to LOUDLY SUCKING HER TEETH. I cant stand it. I feel like killing either her or myself, probably mostly the latter. That would teach my (rarely present) siblings what it is LIKE to live with this illness day in and day out. (It is not CONVENIENT for them to give me a weeks break at a time of my choosing, so maybe they would like to take on the care role full time? Hmm, I thought not, probably would be too inconvenient. Nothing about Alzheimers is frigging convenient.)

Anyway I just needed to sound off because the 24/7 teeth sucking gets on my nerves more than I would have thought possible and I haven't yet found a way of coping - it started just after Christmas. Even the TV blaring at a volume to make your ears bleed does not come close to the stress induced by the loud lip smacking sights and sounds of constant chewing of face.

Thanks for listening!!

PS sorry, I think I have posted this in the wrong bit of the forum - should have been in the "i care for someone with dementia" section. Not finding the site very easy to navigate using a mobile phone!
I totally get it. Just finding this thread has brought my blood pressure back down. This whole thing could have been written by me. God bless you. I need the same extra measure of patience. My husband thinks this is going to do me in.