Social services and care agency suggesting live in care

[Nina55]

My mum lives by herself in her own home, she is declining bit by bit in terms of memory and cognition, but still getting about her village and attending church and social evenings independently with friends. I live 4.5 hours away, visit fortnightly for 3 days, look after her bills, online shopping, liaison with various agencies/doctors etc. She has two care visits a day. She's had the Alzheimers diagnosis for about a year, and medication for less. On balance she's doing okay, she's a bit lonely but insists she wants to stay in her area and not come to Iive with me.
Social services have suggested a live in carer. One of the care agencies is keen on this. I'm alarmed at the cost - £1500/week? Mum wants to consider it carefully and slowly. I worry about the vulnerable position it could put mum in with a stranger living in the house ...... so easy to go through drawers, bags etc for finances, property, care, company..... so many things get lost already. But it might be a relief for her? Her dementia means that she can be manipulated, even though she is quite feisty, and her state fluctuates. I feel this could only come between us. Am I resisting by preserving the status quo? Anthoughts/experiences/recommendations?







Any ideas, experiences

 

[SeaSwallow]

Hello @Nina55 I do not have any experience of this and so cannot give any advice on how live-in care works on a daily basis but I am aware from other posts on here that it is very expensive. Would your mum be self funding or would social services be paying for the carer and would your mum want anyone in the house with her on a permanent basis.
Hopefully someone with direct experience will come along soon to discuss how it worked for them.

 

[Jessbow]

It suggests to me they think she needs more care than she is currently getting.

It may well 'come between you' but mums needs/maybe wants have to be the priority

 

[Violet Jane]

My husband and I arranged live-in care for an elderly friend. Initially, it worked out about as expensive as an expensive local care home, excluding the carer's subsistence allowance and the costs of running the house. However, as the disrupted and late nights became more of a problem we had to engage a waking night carer as well which made the care package much more expensive than a care home. Live-in care can work well but it's not the easy solution that people often think it is. These are the things that you need to be aware of:

1. Live-in carers have working hours and under most live-in care contracts they can't be required to get up more than twice a night. If the client won't go to bed at a reasonable hour, gets up repeatedly or wanders then a waking night carer will have to be brought in as well. Waking night carers are very expensive.

2. Live-in carers have breaks (two hours a day) and if the person can't be left alone these need to be covered by another carer.

3. If you engage / employ carers yourself rather than use an agency it is cheaper but you then have all the legal responsibilities and worry of finding cover, sometimes at short notice, when the carer is absent for any reason. It is likely that you will be using quite a few carers.

4. Carers' working patterns vary. Some carers work two weeks on, two weeks off or four weeks on, one week off. Others work for many weeks or months and then take a long break.

5. You still have the responsibility of dealing with problems in the house.

6. The carer / agency will expect difficult behaviour to be addressed, by medication if necessary.

7. You have to forge a constructive relationship with the carer, responding promptly to any concerns s/he raises. As far as I can tell, live-in carers can pick and choose their placements. They will leave if they are unhappy. Many only want to do short placements.

8. You can't just expect the carer to 'get on with it'. You will still be very involved with your PWD. It is a partnership really.

My husband had a financial POA and actioned it and so we weren't worried about the carer stealing money. There wasn't anything of value in our friend's house. One carer did order excessive amounts of inappropriate food but I spotted this and rectified this straight away as the order confirmations came to me. She was immediately removed by the agency and I was able to amend the order.

Our friend complained about some of the carers and we had to 'investigate' this. We were satisfied that there had been no ill-treatment and only the carer who had ordered the inappropriate food was removed. We came to the conclusion that the complaints were part of her dementia but it was difficult. If we had got rid of everyone she had complained about we would have run out of carers.

In conclusion, if you go down the live-in care route you should expect problems. It's much easier if you live nearby and can pop round to deal with problems, tradesmen etc.

I'll be happy to answer any questions you have.

 

[Nina55]

My husband and I arranged live-in care for an elderly friend. Initially, it worked out about as expensive as an expensive local care home, excluding the carer's subsistence allowance and the costs of running the house. However, as the disrupted and late nights became more of a problem we had to engage a waking night carer as well which made the care package much more expensive than a care home. Live-in care can work well but it's not the easy solution that people often think it is. These are the things that you need to be aware of:

1. Live-in carers have working hours and under most live-in care contracts they can't be required to get up more than twice a night. If the client won't go to bed at a reasonable hour, gets up repeatedly or wanders then a waking night carer will have to be brought in as well. Waking night carers are very expensive.

2. Live-in carers have breaks (two hours a day) and if the person can't be left alone these need to be covered by another carer.

3. If you engage / employ carers yourself rather than use an agency it is cheaper but you then have all the legal responsibilities and worry of finding cover, sometimes at short notice, when the carer is absent for any reason. It is likely that you will be using quite a few carers.

4. Carers' working patterns vary. Some carers work two weeks on, two weeks off or four weeks on, one week off. Others work for many weeks or months and then take a long break.

5. You still have the responsibility of dealing with problems in the house.

6. The carer / agency will expect difficult behaviour to be addressed, by medication if necessary.

7. You have to forge a constructive relationship with the carer, responding promptly to any concerns s/he raises. As far as I can tell, live-in carers can pick and choose their placements. They will leave if they are unhappy. Many only want to do short placements.

8. You can't just expect the carer to 'get on with it'. You will still be very involved with your PWD. It is a partnership really.

My husband had a financial POA and actioned it and so we weren't worried about the carer stealing money. There wasn't anything of value in our friend's house. One carer did order excessive amounts of inappropriate food but I spotted this and rectified this straight away as the order confirmations came to me. She was immediately removed by the agency and I was able to amend the order.

Our friend complained about some of the carers and we had to 'investigate' this. We were satisfied that there had been no ill-treatment and only the carer who had ordered the inappropriate food was removed. We came to the conclusion that the complaints were part of her dementia but it was difficult. If we had got rid of everyone she had complained about we would have run out of carers.

In conclusion, if you go down the live-in care route you should expect problems. It's much easier if you live nearby and can pop round to deal with problems, tradesmen etc.

I'll be happy to answer any questions you have.

Thankyou for taking the time and being so clear, much appreciated