So down and days so monotonous!

[Bagpuss77j]

My moods are so up and down each day, today I woke up today on a downer straight away mum had diarrhoea last night then this morning though thankfully subsided now she screams and shouts all the time she is on the toilet (she screams and shouts pretty much all the time) just really need some help and respite and social services are taking forever to arrange an assessment! Sorry to moan just feel so anxious

 

[irismary]

Hi bagpuss
Sorry to hear this. SS do seem to take an age. We have been waiting 2 months now since my mom's assessment and she is nowhere near as bad. Frustrating. Try ringing local councillor and ask for their support as this is too much for you to manage alone. You are not moaning. You need help. I know SS are busy and stretched but you need support.

 

[brambles]

Hi bagpuss,

I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time. I really hope you get some help soon.
Just wanted to send you a ((hug))

brambles x

 

[jhoward]

agreeing with the others here- you are well entitled to moan: nothing to apologise for!

It is a disgrace that you're having to wait do long, and having to deal with your mum all the time as well. Contacting a local councillor sounds like a good idea...

Sometimes the Alz society can help, I believe, by at least finding someone local you can talk to, someone who has experience of how the system works.

Thinking of you anyway, bagpuss.

 

[marionq]

When in your life were you trained to deal with diarrhoea and constant screaming? Never I guess so moaning is not what you are doing. We need help at times and that is why I would encourage everyone to get on the SS radar as soon as possible. I don't need them at present but I know who they are and they know me because of previous issues.

If things get too much then get on to their after hours desk and ask for the duty officer and explain your situation and why you are buckling at the knees. If you don't holler they will assume you are coping.

Good wishes.

 

[Bagpuss77j]

When in your life were you trained to deal with diarrhoea and constant screaming? Never I guess so moaning is not what you are doing. We need help at times and that is why I would encourage everyone to get on the SS radar as soon as possible. I don't need them at present but I know who they are and they know me because of previous issues.

If things get too much then get on to their after hours desk and ask for the duty officer and explain your situation and why you are buckling at the knees. If you don't holler they will assume you are coping.

Good wishes.

Thank you all for your sympathy and advice I am going to ring Ss tomorrow again! I would never have thought how hard caring for someone with this horrible disease would be mum has had a stroke too so isn't very mobile so it is physically and mentally challenging and I have a very bad gag reflex and weak stomach so taking care of her Toiletry needs(she is doubly incontinent) is something I wouldn't have dreamed I would be able to overcome! Caring full time for someone pushes you over so many boundaries x

 

[LadyA]

Bagpuss, have you come across a book called "The Selfish Pig's Guide to Caring "? - Can't remember who wrote it, but it was written with the full aiding and abetting of his "piglet" (his disabled wife). It's serious but light, and puts it that as a carer, you HAVE TO learn to be a bit of a "selfish pig"- because you have your "piglet " to care for. So no point in just waiting and waiting for people to get back to you. (of course, you have to not get their backs up either!). Anyway, I recommend the book, if only because it can shift us out of feeling like officials, doctors, and everyone else is doing us something of a favour by noticing us and the person we care for. They aren't - everyone has the right to live with dignity, free from pain (as much as possible), and be treated with respect. Those with dementia need more help and support to achieve that life. But they- and their carers should be helped to achieve it. xx

 

[Juliean]

Hi Bagpuss

I totally get how your feeling I was the same, you have to be tough. Short staffed, limited bidets etc are not your problem. You need help now, I threatened the SS with legal action, as it was becoming a farce all words no actions. After 3 months of being messed around, it was surprising how quick assessments and care plans were put in place. So stand your ground and do not take any excuses they are not your issue, good luck xx