Sinking
- Thread starter alex
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Hi Alex
You will find the strength, you will step up to the plate -you will find the strength, it will not be easy but that is what love is all about. I have yet to be there so I cannot offer advice but my thoughts are with you as all TPers are with you.
Hugs
Dick
You will find the strength, you will step up to the plate -you will find the strength, it will not be easy but that is what love is all about. I have yet to be there so I cannot offer advice but my thoughts are with you as all TPers are with you.
Hugs
Dick
Thinking of you
Alex, when I read your messages my heart ached for you and Ray, I, like all our TP friends, can only hurt with you Alex. I do hope you and Raycan get some relief soon.
Hugs John
Alex, when I read your messages my heart ached for you and Ray, I, like all our TP friends, can only hurt with you Alex. I do hope you and Raycan get some relief soon.
Hugs John
Dear Alex,
Just read the posts. So sorry to hear about your husband.
Thinking of you both and hoping tomorrow will bring a sunnier outcome.
Jan
Just read the posts. So sorry to hear about your husband.
Thinking of you both and hoping tomorrow will bring a sunnier outcome.
Jan
Hi everyone
Thanks for the many messages, i was touched when i read them, i'm sorry for not replying sooner but i'm at the hospital most of the time, when i eventually arrived home last night, i felt so nauseous and exhausted i fell into bed (fully clothed) and zonked and then today i dashed out early, just got back.
My brain is so jumbled up that i can't think straight, i can not remember what time i go to or leave the hospital, or even what day it is, everything is just all jumbled up.
I'm not even sure how i feel at the moment (I should be used to this as we went through this trauma for months in intensive care, but its something thats very difficult to deal with and its hard to keep adjusting to the ups and downs)
There is some good news and some bad and this is the way it always happens, the good news is that they have managed to control the bigger seizures, although his mouth, lips and tongue are a bit of a mess, however the smaller seizures are continous, this consists of his left eye, shoulder, arm & hand are violently jerking all the time, the doctors have said that they hope this will subside in time.
They beleive it is being caused by scar tissue on the areas of the brain which were damaged from the strokes, (but they still won't carry out the brain scan) his consultant has said he is used to seeing patients with this kind of damage, suffer from fits of this kind, however, i asked if he is used to these patients having these kind of fits for this length of time and his reply was "No". He said all we can do is wait. He said "I don't want to give you any false hopes, you must remember that he is always at risk from even the slightest infection as he has been so ill, and he is a very, very poorly gentleman. We are not out of the woods yet by a long way, we can only wait and take each problem as it arises"
The bad news is that they now believe he has phneumonia (This is what put him in intensive care in the first place) as his blood results have shown high levels of white cell count plus a high temprature but this will not be confirmed until the results of the chest x-rays come back on tuesday (due to the bank holiday) As things stand at the moment, he is still sedated, although he has opened his eyes a couple of times, he's not really aware of anything. He is still very weak and they are unable to give him a feeding tube due to the fits he is still having, however, he is on a drip. If you saw the result of being so long in icu you would know that he can't afford to lose any more weight.
What is distressing is that even though he is not consious, he keeps gripping my hand when i try to pull away and i know its because he is frightened.
I've no doubt that its going to be another long night until i know the results tomorrow.
Anyway, i don't know what else to say except thanks for the support.
Kind regards
Alex
Thanks for the many messages, i was touched when i read them, i'm sorry for not replying sooner but i'm at the hospital most of the time, when i eventually arrived home last night, i felt so nauseous and exhausted i fell into bed (fully clothed) and zonked and then today i dashed out early, just got back.
My brain is so jumbled up that i can't think straight, i can not remember what time i go to or leave the hospital, or even what day it is, everything is just all jumbled up.
I'm not even sure how i feel at the moment (I should be used to this as we went through this trauma for months in intensive care, but its something thats very difficult to deal with and its hard to keep adjusting to the ups and downs)
There is some good news and some bad and this is the way it always happens, the good news is that they have managed to control the bigger seizures, although his mouth, lips and tongue are a bit of a mess, however the smaller seizures are continous, this consists of his left eye, shoulder, arm & hand are violently jerking all the time, the doctors have said that they hope this will subside in time.
They beleive it is being caused by scar tissue on the areas of the brain which were damaged from the strokes, (but they still won't carry out the brain scan) his consultant has said he is used to seeing patients with this kind of damage, suffer from fits of this kind, however, i asked if he is used to these patients having these kind of fits for this length of time and his reply was "No". He said all we can do is wait. He said "I don't want to give you any false hopes, you must remember that he is always at risk from even the slightest infection as he has been so ill, and he is a very, very poorly gentleman. We are not out of the woods yet by a long way, we can only wait and take each problem as it arises"
The bad news is that they now believe he has phneumonia (This is what put him in intensive care in the first place) as his blood results have shown high levels of white cell count plus a high temprature but this will not be confirmed until the results of the chest x-rays come back on tuesday (due to the bank holiday) As things stand at the moment, he is still sedated, although he has opened his eyes a couple of times, he's not really aware of anything. He is still very weak and they are unable to give him a feeding tube due to the fits he is still having, however, he is on a drip. If you saw the result of being so long in icu you would know that he can't afford to lose any more weight.
What is distressing is that even though he is not consious, he keeps gripping my hand when i try to pull away and i know its because he is frightened.
I've no doubt that its going to be another long night until i know the results tomorrow.
Anyway, i don't know what else to say except thanks for the support.
Kind regards
Alex
Dear Alex,
I'm so sorry to hear how ill your husband is now and I don't know what to say to help or reassure you. It must be a comfort to him that you are there to offer support and understanding. My thoughts and prayers are with you at this time. Please ask a friend or relative to come and be with YOU so that you also have some comfort and support.
Best wishes
from Kayla
I'm so sorry to hear how ill your husband is now and I don't know what to say to help or reassure you. It must be a comfort to him that you are there to offer support and understanding. My thoughts and prayers are with you at this time. Please ask a friend or relative to come and be with YOU so that you also have some comfort and support.
Best wishes
from Kayla
Dear Alex..reading your posts and send you my love and prayers to you and Ray. Helplessness for you as you are in fear for him, watching him suffer and feeling him grip your hand...I am so sorry.
I don't know if this will help you or Ray but perhaps some time when you feel he is frightened try and remember a very enjoyable time you have shared in the past--some time on holiday or in a place you both enjoyed being together..and tell him you are remembering that time..describing again the sights and pleasures you shared. A friend of mine said when her father was in his last weeks she went to visit and found him in pain, not really conscious, and looking frightened; she reminded her father of a time he had spent on a hot sunny holiday near the ocean and then suggested he find a hammock under a tree and lie in the shade listening to the waves on the shore--she said she spoke slowly and he seemed to relax for a little time.
Alex..if you are driving please be very careful..I know what it is like to be driving but your whole being is with the person you are caring for. I hope you are sleeping now. XX Sue
I don't know if this will help you or Ray but perhaps some time when you feel he is frightened try and remember a very enjoyable time you have shared in the past--some time on holiday or in a place you both enjoyed being together..and tell him you are remembering that time..describing again the sights and pleasures you shared. A friend of mine said when her father was in his last weeks she went to visit and found him in pain, not really conscious, and looking frightened; she reminded her father of a time he had spent on a hot sunny holiday near the ocean and then suggested he find a hammock under a tree and lie in the shade listening to the waves on the shore--she said she spoke slowly and he seemed to relax for a little time.
Alex..if you are driving please be very careful..I know what it is like to be driving but your whole being is with the person you are caring for. I hope you are sleeping now. XX Sue
Sorry
Hi everyone
Sorry i have not been in touch for a while, but could not face talking for a while. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone, you don't know how much help you have been.
The hospital have confirmed that he does have Pneumonia, he is unconscious most of the time now and thats a worry as he has not been given any sort of sedation for a few days now, i feel he is slipping away and i'm slowly losing him and thats a scarry place to be.
He is still having the continuous fit, but thankfully not the epileptic type.
Anyway, i can only wait and see what happens over the next few days.
But once again THANK YOU.
Kind regards
Alex
Hi everyone
Sorry i have not been in touch for a while, but could not face talking for a while. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone, you don't know how much help you have been.
The hospital have confirmed that he does have Pneumonia, he is unconscious most of the time now and thats a worry as he has not been given any sort of sedation for a few days now, i feel he is slipping away and i'm slowly losing him and thats a scarry place to be.
He is still having the continuous fit, but thankfully not the epileptic type.
Anyway, i can only wait and see what happens over the next few days.
But once again THANK YOU.
Kind regards
Alex
Hi Alex
It is so sad that you are having to bear the dreadfully upsetting sight of seeing your loved one suffering in such a way. We all hope he is unaware of what he is going through but for you it will be a long time before those images subside. Please look after yourself, your mind must be all over the place. We are all thinking of you.
Stay strong
Kriss x
It is so sad that you are having to bear the dreadfully upsetting sight of seeing your loved one suffering in such a way. We all hope he is unaware of what he is going through but for you it will be a long time before those images subside. Please look after yourself, your mind must be all over the place. We are all thinking of you.
Stay strong
Kriss x
Dear Alex,
We are, indeed, thinking of you, many, many times throughout the day and night, not just when we are sitting at our PCs.
All we can do is pray for you both and send you big virtual hugs......
We are, indeed, thinking of you, many, many times throughout the day and night, not just when we are sitting at our PCs.
All we can do is pray for you both and send you big virtual hugs......
Alex, feel helpless - except to send more 'virtual hugs' and hope they help in whatever way....
Love, Karen, x
Love, Karen, x
Keep breathing
Once again thank you very much for all your kind words, the doctors have told me that they do not expect him to live past the weekend.
I am so totally devastated, i really don't feel as though i can talk, just arrived home after approx 30 hours and i have the most horendous headache.
Got to go back and see this through, although i don't know where the strength will come from, i'm so distraught. Its so very painful to watch the person you love the most die in such a manner. I sit there for hours willing him to keep breathing!
Sorry
Alex
Once again thank you very much for all your kind words, the doctors have told me that they do not expect him to live past the weekend.
I am so totally devastated, i really don't feel as though i can talk, just arrived home after approx 30 hours and i have the most horendous headache.
Got to go back and see this through, although i don't know where the strength will come from, i'm so distraught. Its so very painful to watch the person you love the most die in such a manner. I sit there for hours willing him to keep breathing!
Sorry
Alex
Please don't apologise
Alex
there's no need to apologise. I went through a similar situation with my father a few years ago, and I know that there is little that I can say that can make you feel any better right now but please now that we will all be here in our virtual way to listen and to offer you an electronic ear and shoulder. Whatever you feel you know to do - rant, swear, cry, or whatever else - we understand and you have all our sympathy - and our admiration for being stronger than you realise right now.
Post when you are able, and try - although it will feel impossible - to rest as much as you can. And I hope that you can give Ray what comfort you can, and draw as much comfort as you can from doing so.
I'll be thinking of you.
Dave
Alex
there's no need to apologise. I went through a similar situation with my father a few years ago, and I know that there is little that I can say that can make you feel any better right now but please now that we will all be here in our virtual way to listen and to offer you an electronic ear and shoulder. Whatever you feel you know to do - rant, swear, cry, or whatever else - we understand and you have all our sympathy - and our admiration for being stronger than you realise right now.
Post when you are able, and try - although it will feel impossible - to rest as much as you can. And I hope that you can give Ray what comfort you can, and draw as much comfort as you can from doing so.
I'll be thinking of you.
Dave
Dear Alex,
I've been thinking of you and I don't know what to say to help you through this sad time. Please be careful and don't drive if you are feeling so tired and have a horrendous headache.
You really should have a friend, a relative or a neighbour with you as it is too much for anyone to face alone. Please ask some one for help. We are all behind you but we're in cyberspace and you need a real person there. Take care and I'm still thinking of you.
Best wishes from Kayla
I've been thinking of you and I don't know what to say to help you through this sad time. Please be careful and don't drive if you are feeling so tired and have a horrendous headache.
You really should have a friend, a relative or a neighbour with you as it is too much for anyone to face alone. Please ask some one for help. We are all behind you but we're in cyberspace and you need a real person there. Take care and I'm still thinking of you.
Best wishes from Kayla
Virtual hugs, virtual hand-holding, prayers....
I wish I could offer more to help you gain both strength and comfort in the days ahead .....
Will be thinking of you, and praying (for you both)
Much love, Karen, x
I wish I could offer more to help you gain both strength and comfort in the days ahead .....
Will be thinking of you, and praying (for you both)
Much love, Karen, x
