Should I tell my love his sister has died

[Cristal]

Hello my darling has severe Alzheimer’s
I have been caring for him since his diagnosis in 2018 and the time coming up to that . So a long time.
Two weeks ago my dear Brother died suddenly it was such a shock .
I did tell my love about that but he soon forgot about it and doesn’t mention it.

This past Wednesday my loves dear sister has died.
It’s all so unbelievably sad.
They were very close.
Now I don’t know if I should tell my love she has died . He’s not that well ,
I think he has taken a few more steps along his lonely road these past few days.

The shock I felt when my brother died was dreadful and I’m so worried what telling him about his sister could do to his mind.

I know he will forget, but I don’t want him to feel the dreadful grief that will come with it.
My mind is going all different ways.
Has anyone else faced this and what did you do please.
Thank you x

 

[Grannie G]

Hello @Cristal

Would your love notice if he didn`t see his sister for a while or would he not realise?

If he would not miss her presence, I would not tell him.

The losses of your brother and his sister will be hard for you to grieve alone but better you don`t have to bear your love`s grief too, if you can help it.

 

[Cristal]

As he is at the moment, he does not ask for her. So I could get round that like I do when he asks about his Dad I say oh he went on another cruise and my love is fine with that
When he asks about his brother I say he’s in Australia he is fine with that too. I never tell him they have passed as it’s too distressing for him.
Do you think no to going to the funeral of his sister and my brother they are going to be close together.

 

[Cristal]

That has helped me, thank you Grannie G
I would as soon take the grief myself than see my love so unhappy.
It’s been a bad two weeks
I find myself walking round and I’m crying xx

 

[Grannie G]

I hope you have family and friends to support you during this very sad period @Cristal It`s hard to have to bear this alone.

Crying is OK. Why wouldn't you cry during so much sorrow. It`s one way of releasing your emotions.

I agree it would not serve anything to take your love to the funerals.

Take care

 

[Cristal]

Thank you very much.
I will sleep better tonight now.
Everyone else I have mentioned this too has said ,you’ll know what to do.
But I didn’t . This has helped me I’m glad I wrote in. Bless you x