Shocked how fast my mother has deteriorated

Discussion in 'Welcome and how to use Dementia Talking Point' started by Sharin, Oct 5, 2019.

  1. Sharin

    Sharin Registered User

    Aug 30, 2019
    12
    Hi,
    I'm finding it realky hard to accept how quickly my mother has gone downhill.
    Six weeks ago she was walking, eating & drinking well.
    She started to refuse getting up in the mornings. Some of her carers were not helping her to get up as much as they could have. This progressed to her getting up for about 3 or 4 hrs a day.
    She was eating & drinking well when up but of course we could only get her to take so much in such a short space if time.
    Then she refused to get up at all & refusing all care. She was admitted to hospital with suspect uti as bloods showed raised infection markers.
    I thought, treat the infection & she would improve but that hasn't happened.
    My mother is now so weak. She hasn't eaten much in almost three weeks. They are going to sedate her with lorazepam prior to personal hygiene as she becomes distressed during this time but sleeps & is peaceful at all other times.
    It's all happened in the space of about six weeks & I didn't expect it to happen like this.
    It's been a tough life...
    I lost a baby girl age 3mths - 15 yrs ago, then my eldest son age 26 - 4yrs ago, my 13 yr old daughter tried to end her life in March this year & is still depressed & anxious. Now my mother... compared to losing a child this is very different but it still hurts.
    My very best wishes to you all for a better day & some special moments.
    Sharin xxx
     
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    5,953
    Female
    Scotland
    @Sharin that is a lot to deal with. Dementia doesn’t follow a timetable I’m afraid and does what it wants. On 9th Sept my husband walked to the taxi with his two sticks and when we reached his respite home he walked into it and settled down with tea and biscuits while I unpacked. He fell on that first day and broke his hip and in that short space of time is now a shadow of who he was. Cannot walk, barely eats, speech disappearing rapidly.

    When life gets that bad prolonging it seems worse than the alternative. Best wishes to you and strength.
     
  3. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    10,546
    Merseyside
  4. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    11,080
    Female
    South coast
    Im sorry @Sharin
    Unfortunately, infections of any sort can progress dementia - sometimes quite dramatically
    (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))
     
  5. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Volunteer Host

    Apr 1, 2016
    3,603
    Nottinghamshire
    Sending strength to you @Sharin
     
  6. Rosettastone57

    Rosettastone57 Registered User

    Oct 27, 2016
    1,106
    My mother-in-law deteriorated very quickly last summer. She had been living on her own with carers three times a day, but in the heatwave last year, she became ill. She went into hospital with dehydration and during the 2 weeks there, she lost all her mobility. In her own home, she had been able to move around on her own, but suddenly it was as if she couldn't remember how to walk. Suddenly she didn't know who we were. My husband made a decision that she needed 24/7 supervision and she went into care
     

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