Refusing food and drink

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Tory123, Jul 29, 2015.

  1. LYN T

    LYN T Registered User

    Aug 30, 2012
    6,962
    Brixham Devon
    I'm so sorry for your loss. It must be a very difficult and sad time for you and your family.

    Please accept my condolences.

    Try to be strong and at peace in yourself.

    Take care

    Lyn T XX
     
  2. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    11,113
    Female
    South coast
    Im sorry for your loss tory, but glad she is now at peace.
    Try and be gentle with yourself.
    xx
     
  3. Long-Suffering

    Long-Suffering Registered User

    Jul 6, 2015
    425
    My condolences, Tory. At least your MIL is now at rest.

    LS
     
  4. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,552
    Ireland
    Condolences too, Tory.
     
  5. Pickles53

    Pickles53 Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    2,474
    Radcliffe on Trent
    Deepest sympathy to you tory and all your family. Take care.
     
  6. Padraig

    Padraig Registered User

    Dec 10, 2009
    1,039
    Hereford
    Tell me why

    The following pictures were taken at the NH my wife was in soon after these were taken she gave up and was bedridden and refused food and drink. The baby in the picture is a great granddaughter, then newly born.
    I chose to take my wife home and look after her on my own in my own way. It was no easy task learning how to improve her quality of life. The picture of her in the wheelchair with the same great granddaughter a few years later. I have many pictures and CDs of our years learning to live with Alzheimer's.
    Maybe some one can tell me why, or how I managed to change her condition? I'm no expert, just someone that refuses to follow conventional thinking. I'm not sure if my experiences are of any help to anyone.
     

    Attached Files:

    • 004.jpg
      004.jpg
      File size:
      45.1 KB
      Views:
      201
    • 003.jpg
      003.jpg
      File size:
      57 KB
      Views:
      172
    • 006.jpg
      006.jpg
      File size:
      156.4 KB
      Views:
      213
    • 559.jpg
      559.jpg
      File size:
      289.6 KB
      Views:
      205
  7. Flake

    Flake Registered User

    Mar 9, 2015
    222
    So sorry Tory to read your news. My thoughts are with you x x
     
  8. elaina

    elaina Registered User

    Aug 10, 2015
    41
    Somerset
    I went to see my dad to say goodbye as he is no longer able to swallow and is dying. I kissed him and saw his eyes light up. Completely heart breaking process. Cannot communicate in any way.
     
  9. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,552
    Ireland
    Let us know how things are, elaina. Heartbreaking time. xx
     
  10. Long-Suffering

    Long-Suffering Registered User

    Jul 6, 2015
    425
    He knows you are there - that's the important thing.

    LS
     
  11. LYN T

    LYN T Registered User

    Aug 30, 2012
    6,962
    Brixham Devon
    Elaina-your Dad can communicate. His eyes lit up when he saw you. Always remember that-he was communicating his pleasure at seeing you.

    Yes it is all so very heartbreaking

    Love

    Lyn T XX
     
  12. Padraig

    Padraig Registered User

    Dec 10, 2009
    1,039
    Hereford
    As I discovered with my wife, there are many reasons why people stop eating and drinking. It must be almost impossible for staff in a NH to tackle the underlying causes, as it would take too much time with each patient. A familiar environment helps. As for communication, one does not require speech, there's sight, sound, taste, smell and touch. Familiar faces, places, sounds, tastes and smell can revive happy childhood memories of a time and place. A loving touch requires no words as dogs can show.
    We moved a way from my wife's home town when we married. I made a point of phoning her sisters in Co. Durham from time to time, and asked them to speak to her, in order she could listen to the Geordie accent of her youth. It was quiet a revelation to observe her face as she listened on the phone.

    The one overriding fact I'm pleased with is, that I took no notice of the 'experts' when it came to solving and dealing with the underlying causes of her refusal to drink and eat. When I first fed her, hours later the meal shot back up. I wondered why that was? There were two reasons.

    It's now time I was moving on with my life. It's often said 'one size does not fit all, we are all different'. Yet the same approach is preached time and again and followed with many of the problems encountered with Alzheimer's patients.
    I wish you well.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.