Dear Helena
I agree that while Mum is in hospital that is an excellent chance to get your point across and tell them that she cannot look after herself. My mother in law is currently in hospital, the second time in three weeks. The first time she was admitted she had a chest/urine infection, she was discharged on the friday only after they confirmed with my 86 yr. old father in law that he could still look after her (he can't but that's a different story) my husband and I explained that he doesn't do 'personal' carers come in 3 times a day, but the consultant says no wonder she has urine infections she needs changing more often, (we know that) anyway she came home by hospital transport - no underwear, and no pad, and my husband had specifically requested the evening before to make sure she was padded up before dischage - no problem - it obviously was!
The next day, Saturday the lunchtime carer returned her to bed as she wasn't well,when we arrived she was asleep,
when she awoke she was having hallucinations and then chronic diarrhoea, I had to deal with all of that and then when she was back in bed it happened again, I said I couldn't cope a 2nd time, my husband took over and phoned the doctor, my father in law wanted to wait for the evening carers assessment, we overode that decision - Dr. arrived and she was re admitted to hospital, where it was confirmed that she had colostridium difficile, very infectious diarroah bug. She was put in a side room on a coronary care unit!
a dirty nightdress was put unbagged into the bedside locker - no wonder they have bugs. After a couple of days they needed that bed, so was transferred to the isolation ward, although she had diarrhoea she was improving and walking about - you can't make an alzheimer patient stay in a room. My brother in law took his mum to the hospital cafe, when we visited he caught us up and took us into the cafe, said this visit was much easier because she was interested in all the people in the cafe, I questioned him on bring her to the cafe, he said it was okayed by a nurse. Anyway, she wet herself all over the floor - no pad - it was cordoned off and housekeeping were called to clear it up . Back on the ward I queried that she was allowed to the cafe, the nurse said what has she got when I said c. diff. she said definitely not, my brother in law stated that he had asked a nurse pointed out which one, and then this nurse said if she said it was okay then it was (obviously one nurse was more senior) I then queried (this was my first visit to the isolation ward) why the lady visiting the next door room had got plastic apron and gloves on, and we were told hasn't anyone told you you must put them on (hang on - she has been in the cafe) so all week we have been putting them on. We have not taken her out of the ward, and one day I even reported some poo on her chair!!
Anyway, she continues to make good progress, but they have convinced my father in law that she requires 24hr. care and they are carrying out an assessment, and she will go into a care home on her discharge, (she is classed as an unsafe discharge) we have been saying this for 2 years but father in law says the hospital confirmed it!!AAAAAAAArgh .
I think you need to be talking with social services hospital department.
My best wishes to you.
Carol x
ps. We are very sad that she is going into 24hr. care but she will receive all the help that she requires (which is a lot) and she will have a lot more dignity - and gosh she deserves that more than anything. We all love her and want what is the very best for her needs, and that wasn't happening in her home environment.