I havent had much to say online lately, Gran is as settled as she can be in her CH, her memory is very poor and her eyesight is deteriorating rapidly. But having read Miss Merlot's posts in recent days and some of the responses, they have really made me have a long think about 'caring'.
Do I care? or do I just go through the acts of caring? What do I want for gran and what would she want for herself?
Today I visited her, we had a cuppa and an apple slice I brought in, then we went for a walk. In hindsight the walk in this heat was too much for her and she was struggling by the time we got back, (only out about 15 minutes and never out of sight of the CH roof). She was exhausted yet had loved it! Another cuppa and a sit down and she was ready for a doze so I left.
So my thought is if she were to be taken ill later would I blame myself for taking her out? Do I put quantity or quality first in her life, she says she doesnt want to live like this so isnt it better if she goes out with a smile on her face? Happiness really is in the moment for her. She hates the day to day at the CH.
rambling now...so i'll go!
Do I care? or do I just go through the acts of caring? What do I want for gran and what would she want for herself?
Today I visited her, we had a cuppa and an apple slice I brought in, then we went for a walk. In hindsight the walk in this heat was too much for her and she was struggling by the time we got back, (only out about 15 minutes and never out of sight of the CH roof). She was exhausted yet had loved it! Another cuppa and a sit down and she was ready for a doze so I left.
So my thought is if she were to be taken ill later would I blame myself for taking her out? Do I put quantity or quality first in her life, she says she doesnt want to live like this so isnt it better if she goes out with a smile on her face? Happiness really is in the moment for her. She hates the day to day at the CH.
rambling now...so i'll go!