1. Sooe

    Sooe Registered User

    Nov 10, 2008
    111
    Hi all
    Just sitting here reading your many posts and thought I would drop a line, hope all your Xmas's went better than we all expected. We are sooo glad ours is over, first one with MIL in her new home, excellent as it is, the thoughts and guilt are still unbearable, today went in to see her - surprise surprise a good day!!! Xmas she wouldn't or couldn't even open her eyes and spent lengthy times just screaming etc - horrendous, felt so so sad for her and so so helpless. No pressy opening could be attempted, we spent the whole time feeling wretched and rotten for her, I have been married 38 years every single xmas and birthday and celebration had MIL and FIL and SIL spending the times with us, now its just me and hubby and our only daugher all missing the family thats now lost, or thats how it feels with MIL the last link and now in a home, just thank our lucky stars that we found such an excellent nursing home for her after our horrendous panic in finding and sorting things out after all happening so quickly and MIL going downhill so very fast, can't believe 3mths ago she seemed to be coping with us caring for her, and then BAM everything hit and hard. For those searching for a good nursing home they are out there, just keep looking. Still lots to be sorted out and we are just too tired after the last 2yrs to go forward just now, losing Father in Law June 07 Sister in Law few days before Xmas 07 both sad unhappy shock passings, and now Mother in Law getting so desperately poorly in November roll on 2009.
    Can someone please tell me about continous care benefit and who qualifies and how to go about it, its all such an unknown landmine trying to fatham our way round everything needing to be done. This forum is a complete sanity saver, even tho the posts before xmas had me crying and unable to even post until now. Hope everyone did better than we managed, can't believe what a strong group of people you all are, and what great help and support you all give to each other, I have nothing but respect for each and every one of you.
    Sooe
     
  2. lesmisralbles

    lesmisralbles Account Closed

    Nov 23, 2007
    5,543
    Dear Sooe

    This forum is a complete sanity saver, even tho the posts before xmas had me crying and unable to even post until now. Hope everyone did better than we managed, can't believe what a strong group of people you all are, and what great help and support you all give to each other, I have nothing but respect for each and every one of you.

    Thank you SooeX
    It did indeed save my sanity.
    Barb XX & Ron ZZZ
     
  3. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    If you google Continuing Care you should find the forms that have to be completd (by nursing staff) - ticking the right boxes for severe/moderate/low care. If you have difficulty pm me as I think I once printed off copies.

    If you have a good NH then I suggest you chat to the Manager. In our case the Assessment Unit completed the first application in my presence. I have not had a result yet but should I need another review or appeal the NH Management have indicated they will assist with it (David has only been there 10 days!).
    I hope you can get similar help.

    Best wishes Jan
     
  4. frederickgt

    frederickgt Registered User

    Jun 4, 2005
    124
    Hornchurch,Essex
    Xmas over! Happy new year!

    Happly new year to all on TP.could use some anti-depressants myself.It wouldnt be duifficult for 2009 to be a better year.
    Hope I never see another Christmas
    frederickgt
     
  5. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Hi I thought just those thoughts in 2007.
    I have said so many times it does not get better it gets different.
    I still miss my Peg as much as ever,but the pain is a little better.
    You will pull through Frederick,we are here for you ,contact whenever you wish, on the board or PM.
    Norman
     
  6. Margaret W

    Margaret W Registered User

    Apr 28, 2007
    3,725
    North Derbyshire
    Hi Sooe

    No, we are not a group of strong people, we are just ordinary people doing our best for our loved ones, and we gain strength from the lovely people on this site, and I am being a wally in thanking them all for the support when I needed it, and I am sure they will all do the same for you.

    Love and best wishes at this time of year.

    Margaret
     
  7. frederickgt

    frederickgt Registered User

    Jun 4, 2005
    124
    Hornchurch,Essex
    Phew xmas over!

    Thank you Norman,I am feeling a little better this morning,as one old sailor to another may we have calm seas and a safe harbour
    frederickgt
     
  8. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    well said Frederick
    shelter in the lee of the TP rock until the sea becomes calmer.
    Norman
     
  9. Sooe

    Sooe Registered User

    Nov 10, 2008
    111
    Thanks yet again

    Hi Frederick
    Do so hope your continuing to feel much better, I too didn't want Xmas or New Year to happen at all - BUT life goes on and fingers crossed will eventually get better. Our life at the moment is in complete and utter turmoil as is most of the TP members lives too, or else why would we all be pouring our hearts out on TP.....it helps to talk to strangers who understand and care and have been there and done that! so you keep going and keep positive.

    Many thanks too to Jan re continuous care, will be off looking for forms, its just crippling our sanity even more finding self funding, feels like we just can't move on for the sheer panicking that is our lives at the moment. BUT as I have just said to Frederick, things do have to get better - at least I so hope so or it will finish us all off.

    Thanks to everyone elses support as well, and of course I beg to differ with you all saying you are not strong just people getting on, well I think you are all so strong and capable and hopefully we can get to that stage at some point too.

    Well done to all of you keeping our sanity in place in times of stresss.

    Sooe xxx
     

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