I find this odd but do not want to interfere. My daughters mother in law has carers coming four times a day to care for her. When I asked about the costs they do not know and have not been bills yet. She is self funding all she said the bill will be very high. I would have thought they should be told how much the care package is going to cost. She also does not get benefits. The first one was declined and he has submitted another one and got help from age concern. In my opinion the son is too soft in his approach when dealing with local authority and social services. He said there is very little support and help going through the maze. I can only listen to my daughters complain and cannot offer much advice.
Paying carers
- Thread starter Jan48
- Start date
Hello @Jan48
It sounds as if your son in law is trying his best to provide care for his mother and approach it from different angles.
It`s quite refreshing to believe the quality of care is more important than the cost when so many sons and daughters are intent on protecting their inheritances.
If your son in law has been the primary carer he will have been under tremendous stress prior to getting to this stage . I remember when caring for my mother, finance was the least of my worries but my sister, who had had absolutely no input wanted all the financial details.
My apologies if I have misunderstood but primary carers at this extremely difficult stage do not need to have to justify their actions on behalf of the person they are caring for.
It sounds as if your son in law is trying his best to provide care for his mother and approach it from different angles.
It`s quite refreshing to believe the quality of care is more important than the cost when so many sons and daughters are intent on protecting their inheritances.
If your son in law has been the primary carer he will have been under tremendous stress prior to getting to this stage . I remember when caring for my mother, finance was the least of my worries but my sister, who had had absolutely no input wanted all the financial details.
My apologies if I have misunderstood but primary carers at this extremely difficult stage do not need to have to justify their actions on behalf of the person they are caring for.
My experience of paying carers (we are self-funded too) is that we are are billed once a month and the company is paid using direct debit. The billing is sent to me as an attachment in an email. If I didnt pay the agency, they would withdraw their care.
I suspect that the son has organised the care and payment, but is not telling your daughter the details, because he does not want to worry her.
I suspect that the son has organised the care and payment, but is not telling your daughter the details, because he does not want to worry her.
I'm not sure why you think your son in law is soft on LA. If the mother in law is self funding, social services and the local authority aren't interested. This is my experience and that of many forum members. It sounds like your son in law is doing a great job and he will get a monthly bill probably by email which is paid by direct debit.
It sounds as if your son in law is doing all the right things. The payment should come out of his mum's resources, not his, and hopefully he has lasting power of attorney so can manage her affairs legally. It's really good that he is having a second attempt at applying for benefits on her behalf, they can be tricky. What a good son! Four visits a day is the usually the maximum that is provided. After that a care home may be recommended (but will be no cheaper and possbly more expensive).
As self-funders we got absolutely zero help from social services and this is pretty standard. I went on a course for carers organised by the Alzheimers Society and we were told this quite explicitly by two social workers who ran one session. But it was also true in my own experience too.
As long as the MIL has enough funds to cover the cost then your son in law needn't worry about it.
I arranged my mum's care through social services even though she is self funding
The care company will submit to the council who then send a bill. It can take a couple of months to set up because the two parties are involved
It's not really a problem to wait for the bills, there is no rush to pay them
I would advise to check them though, I found that she was charged twice for a couple of weeks. I queried it and the invoice was put on hold for about 8 (!) Months while the council kept sending reminders that I ignored.
My mum gets 4 visits and it costs about 1k per month. Visits are 45, 30, 15 and 15 mins each day
Going through social services means you have to pay as a consult annual fee but the hourly care rate is cheaper. One private company wanted to send 2 people to do medicines for 30 minutes cos they said the area was dodgy. That would have been far to expensive!
The care company will submit to the council who then send a bill. It can take a couple of months to set up because the two parties are involved
It's not really a problem to wait for the bills, there is no rush to pay them
I would advise to check them though, I found that she was charged twice for a couple of weeks. I queried it and the invoice was put on hold for about 8 (!) Months while the council kept sending reminders that I ignored.
My mum gets 4 visits and it costs about 1k per month. Visits are 45, 30, 15 and 15 mins each day
Going through social services means you have to pay as a consult annual fee but the hourly care rate is cheaper. One private company wanted to send 2 people to do medicines for 30 minutes cos they said the area was dodgy. That would have been far to expensive!
which only goes to show how right the OP's son in law is about navigating the maze. Everything is different, depending on which Local Authority and which NHS Trust you live in!
Hi @Jan48
I presume that the benefit that your son in law (SIL) is applying for is Attendance Allowance (AA). If your SIL’s mother needs four care visits a day then she should get AA. Getting help from an organisation such as Age UK or Citizens Advice to fill in this type of form is a good idea.
I presume that the benefit that your son in law (SIL) is applying for is Attendance Allowance (AA). If your SIL’s mother needs four care visits a day then she should get AA. Getting help from an organisation such as Age UK or Citizens Advice to fill in this type of form is a good idea.
