Hi,
I'm new to the forum but feel I could do with any advice anyone can give me. My parents - 85 and 82 - both have Alzheimers. They've been diagnosed about 2 years and have been living 120 miles away from me in the family home with support from carers. As they have deteriorated we have increased the levels of support gradually but a couple of months ago my Dad was ill with a UTI, was admitted to hospital and everything went haywire. He couldn't cope being away from my Mum and became hugely disoriented and aggressive. My Mum, at home and not very mobile, couldn't be persuaded to eat and couldn't remember where my Dad was so became very upset. Anyway to cut a long story short after 3 weeks - and when my Dad was clinically ready to leave hospital - I took the decision to put them into respite care near me to try and get everything back on an even keel with a view to this becoming a longer term arrangement.
The care home I chose is lovely and they have their own suite there and I really thought after being their a few weeks - with me visiting nearly every day - they would settle. It really is lovely and my Mum has settled brillianty but my Dad hasn't and six weeks down the line he is still phoning me most evenings demanding to know when he is going home. He doesn't really seem to know where home is - talks about houses they lived in 20 years ago. He also doesn't seem to appreciate that my Mum can't cope physically with the house they have been living in (she can't manage the stairs) and is happier where they are. But he's quite forceful and he's wearing me down.
How long does it take typically for Alzheimers sufferers to settle into new environments? I'm desparate for him to calm down and settle ....I can't see how they can cope in their own home but I'm starting to waiver and consider a home arrangement as his agitation doesn't seem to be getting better
Is there anything that anyone has had success with settling someone who has struggled to settle? The home are fairly relaxed about it and seem to think it's improving but can't seem to suggest anything else I can do to help.
Any advice would be hugely appreciated.
I'm new to the forum but feel I could do with any advice anyone can give me. My parents - 85 and 82 - both have Alzheimers. They've been diagnosed about 2 years and have been living 120 miles away from me in the family home with support from carers. As they have deteriorated we have increased the levels of support gradually but a couple of months ago my Dad was ill with a UTI, was admitted to hospital and everything went haywire. He couldn't cope being away from my Mum and became hugely disoriented and aggressive. My Mum, at home and not very mobile, couldn't be persuaded to eat and couldn't remember where my Dad was so became very upset. Anyway to cut a long story short after 3 weeks - and when my Dad was clinically ready to leave hospital - I took the decision to put them into respite care near me to try and get everything back on an even keel with a view to this becoming a longer term arrangement.
The care home I chose is lovely and they have their own suite there and I really thought after being their a few weeks - with me visiting nearly every day - they would settle. It really is lovely and my Mum has settled brillianty but my Dad hasn't and six weeks down the line he is still phoning me most evenings demanding to know when he is going home. He doesn't really seem to know where home is - talks about houses they lived in 20 years ago. He also doesn't seem to appreciate that my Mum can't cope physically with the house they have been living in (she can't manage the stairs) and is happier where they are. But he's quite forceful and he's wearing me down.
How long does it take typically for Alzheimers sufferers to settle into new environments? I'm desparate for him to calm down and settle ....I can't see how they can cope in their own home but I'm starting to waiver and consider a home arrangement as his agitation doesn't seem to be getting better
Is there anything that anyone has had success with settling someone who has struggled to settle? The home are fairly relaxed about it and seem to think it's improving but can't seem to suggest anything else I can do to help.
Any advice would be hugely appreciated.