Not so much a blog - more notes and thoughts

[Nan2seven]

Thank you so much for your posts.
Sadly, Brian was quite "out of it" when I visited to help him with his tea/supper this afternoon.
He fell asleep half-way through and could not form his words properly when he went to speak. He tried only once.
But ... this is dementia. Up one day, down the next.
The TV was on again, slightly too loud.
When I mentioned the TV to the Sister yesterday (explaining to her that Brian had thought he was bleeding and had been shot), she said that other residents like to watch it. (All day?)
There is no "quiet room" - to get away from it, Brian would have to go back to his bedroom. Don't think it would occur to him to ask.
No shouting in the lounge to-day.
If the TV is on too loud tomorrow, may mention it to Pam. She said not to hesitate about anything ....

Pied, I think your idea for a channel on TV for the elderly is brilliant. It could consist of nothing but repeats of well-loved and familiar programmes, old films and musicals. I wonder how one would move that suggestion forward. It is too good just to discard.

Would everyone give it some thought and perhaps come up with some suggestions as to what the next step would be. Whom should we lobby? Would it be Joan Bakewell, do you think?

Love to you all,
Nan XXX

 

[piedwarbler]

I've been thinking about the TV channel too. It would make Mum's life so much easier. I spend most visits faffing about with the TV timer trying to set up channels with films I think she'll like!

Maybe try the BBC via Joan Bakewell. There would be a big target audience wouldn't there??

 

[Helen33]

Dear Nan,

I've just read of your visit yesterday and the conversation with Brian I couldn't have been more pleased for you. Even though it was different today, you still sound more relaxed and hopeful that you have for a very long while. I do hope that it is less of a roller coaster for you to give you time to catch your breath.

Big Hug.

Love

 

[Grannie G]

What a brilliant idea.
Dhiren also thinks everything on television is real and is disturbed by what he sees. But if it wasn`t on he would miss it . Even I`m in the way sometimes.
Isn`t there a `Gold` channel on Sky?

 

[Nan2seven]

Pied, I am going to make my bedtime coffee and then sit down and Google Joan Bakewell straight away. I can't recall her proper title, but it is something like ambassador for the elderly - or summat. Glad you've been thinking about it further as well.

Love, Nan XXX

 

[Nan2seven]

We don't have Sky, but I do pick up a Gold channel with Virgin. Do they repeat old gardening programmes? (Old gardeners are very relaxing, aren't they - dear Old Geoff Hamilton and more recently Alan Titchmarsh.) "Last of the Summer Wine" sort of stuff, and "Dad's Army" - does that get on to Gold? But they probably wouldn't include all the old Hollywood musicals, would they - Doris Day films and stuff like that.

Love, Nan XXX

 

[Nan2seven]

High point followed by a low

Brian had another "silent seizure" sometime to-day, i.e. a seizure without the tremors. (I had been thinking for a good year or more that they were TIAs, but not so, it seems.)

He had been so alert and with it on Wednesday when I saw him at tea-time. Better than I have seen him in weeks. Maybe even months. And then yesterday clearly not with it much at all. And now to-day. I seem to recall reading here at TP some time ago that a "high point" is sometimes followed by a mild stroke/seizure/TIA, and it had occurred to me that this might happen. But of course I had hoped that it would not.

He was in bed when I arrived at 5 p.m. to-day, very drowsy and unable to stay awake long enough to finish a small pot of his favourite black cherry yogurt. But he did recognise me. Just couldn't stay awake. It will probably take him another 24 hours to come round properly. But I am very pleased with the care he is getting which is a huge, huge load off my mind.

And I learned that our GP had called into the home to-day to introduce himself - and that he told them he would be reviewing Brian's meds., particularly whether the haloperidol were necessary, in two to three weeks' time.

 

[Izzy]

Sorry to hear about the seizure, Nan, even though you sort of expected it. Glad the GP went round to the home. It must be a comfort to know that your own GP will still be involved. xx

 

[grobertson62]

hello nan

sorry to hear Brian wasn't so well today

but it does sound that he will now receive the care he so richly deserves

thinking of you & sending you a hug

Look forward to you now campaigning for a dementia channel. I am sure you would get some signatures for it on here!!

Love GILL

 

[piedwarbler]

Cripes! That sounds like amazingly good care. I am so pleased for you and slightly tinged with green. I'd love some of this sort of care for my mum xx

 

[thatwoman]

Hi Nan,
I'm so pleased that Brian is getting such good care, though sorry that he has had another seizure. I find that Dad is often really good just before a stroke, but hadn't realised it was connected.
I'm so pleased to hear you starting to unwind over the course of this thread! It sounds as if you've found the right home. Dad started to eat and to relax enough to have conversations once he went into the home. I think the hospital must have been very frightening for him.
I like your idea of a special TV channel. Dad gets confused about the TV as well, and when they have Midsomer murders on in the lounge, he thinks that it's happening just outside his window. If they watch Titanic on DVD, all the residents think they're on a cruise (even though the closest most of them have been is a trip on the ferry across the Mersey!) Good luck with that: it would have been wonderful while Dad was at home.
Love and hugs,
Sue xxx

 

[Nan2seven]

Hallo, Sue,

Have to just put you right over the idea of the TV channel for the elderly: it was Piedwarbler who came up with it. I think it's brilliant, too. So much so that I have sent a letter off to-day to someone who I dearly hope might be able to do something about it, or at least point us in the right direction. Absolutely nothing may come of it, but as I have said to Pied, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

Love, Nan XXX

 

[Helen33]

Hi Nan,

I see that you are up too. I'm sorry to hear that your Brian has had a seizure. Getting good enough care for Brian was always a priority and I am sure you must feel tremendously relieved.

I hope your visit tomorrow is a good one.

Love

 

[Nan2seven]

Dear Helen, thank you for your post.

Brian was up and dressed to-day and back in the lounge. He was a little better than yesterday evening, but nothing as alert as he had been on Wednesday.

He was looking anxious and worried for quite a bit of the time and I wondered if he was asking himself who this woman was who had sat down beside him and was stroking his hand and occasionally wiping his nose. I asked him if he knew who I was (even though some say it's not a good idea to ask) and he said "You're my wife." So that was all right .... Except that later, when I was about to pop a piece of sandwich into his mouth, he looked at me rather shyly and said "Marry me."

I beamed at him and said "I'm already married to you. Isn't that lovely?" He smiled a broad but disbelieving smile and said "Bloody hell!" as though he couldn't believe his luck. I laughed aloud and said "We've just had our 51st wedding anniversary. Do you remember? You were in hospital."

I'm not sure whether he remembered or not. He frowned and smiled at the same time, but ceased looking quite so anxious as he had been. And presently fell asleep while I stroked his forehead.

I AM pleased with the care, Helen. So far, it all seems to be going well and I am hugely relieved.

Love, Nan XXX

 

[littlegem]

Hello Nan,

Your Brian clearly adores you Nan.
What a compliment that he wanted to marry you, the spark is obviously still there despite his illness.

I do hope you are feeling more at peace with your situation now that Brian is settled.

I stroke my hubby's head to get him to sleep too.

take care Nan and sleep well
xxxannexxx

 

[Izzy]

How lovely nan!

 

[Grannie G]

I think this is the first light hearted post I`ve read from you recently Nan. What a relief.

I told Dhiren it was our 48th anniversary last week and he said he was so sorry he`d forgotten.

 

[Nan2seven]

Thank you, Anne and Izzy.

Sylvia, "doom and gloom" seem to have prevailed for such a long time, it is a relief for me too to be able to record something angst-free.

I can picture your Dhiren apologising for having forgotten your anniversary. Has he made any more mention of the "poor soul", the young girl he had given a present to? I think her name began with a B.. I was so intrigued by that. Had it been a dream, do you think?

Love, Nan XXX

 

[Grannie G]

Has he made any more mention of the "poor soul", the young girl he had given a present to? I think her name began with a B.. I was so intrigued by that. Had it been a dream, do you think?

No Nan. I have no idea what brought this on.

Dhiren has been quite sleepy during my last couple of visits.

A smiley and loving greeting with an `Aahh!` of pleasure, followed by eating his treats and then dozing most of the times.
We just sit holding hands while I do crosswords etc.
It could be a lot worse.

 

[Christin]

Dear Nan, such a lovely post

Best wishes.