Not coping that well...

[ROSEANN]

Dear Gigi
Just to wish you all the best for the future I am sure it will be okay.
Now it`s time for you.
Muxh love Roseann xxx

 

[BeverleyY]

Eric is going into permanent care on Monday. The CH manager has accepted him and it's such a relief....

SW rang today to let me know she has organised the transfer...and I took the opportunity to let her know my misgivings about the manager of the respite home's attitude. Apparently this has happened before...they don't like anyone who has "behavioural" problems there..

On Sunday I'm going over to take some bits and pieces and Eric's TV and videos..D) so that they can get his room ready for him.

The AS lady visited me today. As always she is very supportive..

I've had a lot of time to reflect and share my feelings with others who have walked this road and it has strengthened me.
Our break allowed time for reflection, support, tears, laughter and friendship..(and lots of lovely food..)

So Eric and myself now move on to the next part of our journey. I'll still be there for him..but in a different way.

Today I have no fear or anxiety..

There is sadness in my heart, but I'm thankful to have the support of friends both virtual and real to share the journey with.

Love xx

Hi Gigi

I glad you are feeling positive about Eric's permanent move (albeit sad at the same time).

You have done so much, and coped so well (far better than many many people).

I wish you, and Eric all the best on this new phase of life.

Beverley xx

 

[gigi]

Thankyou all for your kindness and understanding.

It's been a funny old day..my internet connection has been very dodgy but it seems to have settled down for now!

I phoned the CH about taking Eric's things over tomorrow and once again was reassured by them.. The tears started again as I was talking and they phoned me back a while later to ask if I was ok..very thoughtful of them.

So Eric's favourite videos are in a box waiting to meet him on Monday along with his TV and some favourite pictures and photos.

Have typed up a potted history of Eric and some bits of info that may be helpful to them and put them in a folder to take over.

Beyond that I can't see..so will just let things take their course. It's a very odd feeling but I'm sure many of you will identify with that.

Love xx

 

[Jo1958]

Gigi, hi
Well done you for getting here!
Sending you love and support for the days ahead and good luck for your visit tomorrow.
Best wishes, Jo

 

[BeckyJan]

Hello Gigi:

You are doing OK!! I do identify only too well - you will get through this and Eric will be well cared for and loved by you and others now. In truth the sadness will never leave you, but that is dementia and we have to face it full on, otherwise we are left behind go down with it too.

As Connie would say 'stay strong'

Love

 

[sue38]

Beyond that I can't see..

Absolutely not - one step at a time. You are doing brilliantly, and the CH sounds a gem.

Hope it goes well tomorrow.

 

[TinaT]

I'm so glad that you have got things well sorted out for Eric. I'm sure that you will have some quality time together yet to come, free of the daily stresses you were under.

xxTinaT

 

[muse]

Dear Gigi

First of all - all my very best wishes for Monday. The CH sounds lovely, and I'm sure you and Eric will, over time, settle down into this new phase and see things differently as described by many others.

I'm the youngest in my family, and most of my life I've had my big sister experiencing all the normal steps and phases of life just before me, giving me some warning of what's to come (I have occasionally wondered if that's a good or a bad thing). Now that I'm experiencing something she hasn't, I almost feel like you're that sister who's just that one step ahead of me. And, of course, there are many others here on TP who are several steps ahead and have found their solutions, more peace and the wisdom to deal with this horrible condition. I firmly believe that there comes a point when you need a little bit more distance to find this wisdom.

My loving and understanding thoughts will be with you on Monday, and I look forward to hearing from you how it went.

Big hug - Kathy

 

[hazytron]

Hi Gigi

My thoughts will be with you on Monday. You have been travelling along your journey of Dementia with such bravery, the odd wobble, yes of course, they are all allowed, there are no rules, no map to follow, we all do the best we can.

You are an inspiration to so many of us and, for me, I am sure you will gain experience from your "new" path, about to be taken, with Eric and will be in yet another position to pass on the knowledge and advise to us all as we face the changes which will surely come our way.

Lots of love

Hazel

 

[gigi]

It's been a very emotional day today..and one of reflection.

I haven't seen Eric but have phoned the CH and am reassured that that he has enjoyed a good lunch and was about to be escorted into the smoking lounge for an after lunch ciggie.

They're going to ask their DNs to do a continence assessment...meanwhile they've asked if I can take any remaining pads and netty knickers in to tide him over.

They've also asked for his wheelchair so they can take him out..

It all sounds very positive, and I'm full of relief that he is actually there.

The next part of our journey starts from here.

Tomorrow I see the GP to request a "sick note"...I'll be signing on for benefits for the time being. Spoke to a nice lady on the Benefits Helpline who has told me exactly how to go about things...getting the sick note is the first part of that process.
She was way too nice, however, and the tears started again..

On Friday the Red Cross are coming out to collect Eric's hospital bed and the Mangar Cushion.

It all seems very unreal.

In fact the last 3 weeks seem unreal...it feels as though I'm slowly waking up from a very bad dream.

Thankyou again for your kind words and your thoughts and understanding.

Love xx

 

[burfordthecat]

Gigi

I have been thinking about you and Eric loads today. It sounds as though Eric's move was smooth and without upset.

Think of this being the start of new chapter in both of your lives as you both learn to walk very different paths.

Time for Gigi to take care of.........Gigi.

With loads of love and hugs

Carina x x

 

[gigi]

Thankyou Carina...

Love and hugs are welcome and very much appreciated.

And tissues...if anyone has any going spare, please..

Love xx

 

[Canadian Joanne]

Gigi, it does sound as though it's going as smoothly as it possibly can. The home seems to have everything well in hand and know how to handle Eric.

Now it's time for you to rest, recoup and regain your physical and emotional strength.

 

[Helen33]

And tissues...if anyone has any going spare, please..

Sending not only the tissues but lots of love at this turning point in your life.

 

[Mameeskye]

Gigi

It is so sad when things come to this stage, but it also the start of a new life for you, hard though that may be to envisage at the moment.

In time you will have fun with Eric again, without the constant strain of care 24/7, unremitting, relentless and seemingly never-ending. It will be limited now to the amount of time you wish to offer.

Eric will be well cared for. But the tears will come as you grieve the loss of your life together.

My love goes to you both at this time.

(((Hugs))))

Love

Mameeskye

 

[scarletpauline]

I'm thinking of you as well Gigi, and I know you have done the right thing, you couldn't go on as you were doing, you would have cracked, in fact you nearly did, love and hugs, Pauline xxx

 

[Lynne]

Love'n Hugs Gigi;
it's the proverbial "rock & a hard place" choice isn't it, in other words neither are ever going to be good but one is slightly better than the other.
And as time goes on, and you are able to get some structure into your own life again, it will get better.

XXXXX

 

[sad nell]

Gigi, sending a hug , wish it could be for real. you are doing just great Lady and i hope Eric settles well into this new phase and that you continue to find yourself whatever path you take lots of love to you both scatty Pam

 

[Nan2seven]

Dear Gigi,
Thinking of you and Eric and sending love,
Nan XXX

 

[larivy]

hi Gigi glad everything seems to be going well sending you a big hug love larivy