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[BurleyBear]

Hi. I'm new to this. My 88 year old Mum has deteriorated really quickly from just age related forgetfulness to forgetting what she had for dinner 5 minutes after eating it, medication, what she's been doing etc. Me and my brother are popping in everyday between us to make sure she's ok. She's physically not so good and now mentally struggling. We're in the middle of assessment, MRI scan done but for me there is no doubt. I've read the advice about not disagreeing not asking questions but my Mum has always been my go to and the one I share things with and I'm struggling to cope with the new Mum who can't remember stuff. Any advice on how to adjust so that I can do my best for her and for myself. TIA

 

[Gosling]

Hello @PadghamTracy and firstly welcome to this supportive and friendly forum. Members here really do want to help.
I am sorry to read about your Mum. It's so tough for you when you see your loved one deteriorate in front of your eyes. And I know just what you mean about missing being able to share and talk things through. I had the same with my dear Mum.
It's good that you and your brother are popping in every day, but please do remember, now is the best your Mum will be. And in the medium term you may need to think about extra care support, as you won't be able to continue alone as her condition worsens.
Just do your best, as you are doing now. cherish the good times, the good moments, the smiles etc.
Do also have a good look around the forums, there is plenty of support here and understanding too. Take care.

 

[Grable]

On a practical note, have you sorted out a Lasting Power of Attorney for your mum? When I was in your position, I'd never given it a thought - in fact I didn't know these things existed. Somebody asked if we'd got them in place and I went and found out about them. It was nearly too late. Mum knew what we were doing at that point. What I hadn't realised was that she'd forgotten how to write her signature! It took a bit of practice to get that sorted!

 

[BurleyBear]

Thank you for your replies and support. Yes Grable we do have the financial poa for mum which we're thankful for as she needed support with payments etc a while back.
The care situation we're both struggling with. I know we can't do it all long term but mum is quite resistant to outside help. Work in progress I guess.