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[Shegra]

My sister is 68 and has been diagnosed with LBD. She is now in a nursing home as of yesterday. My niece, (it’s her Mum ] is feeling very guilty as my sister has told her ….she hates the place. My sister requires nursing care and my niece has young children.
How do I support my sister and niece …. Unfortunately I am not in good health either.
Any help would be appreciated.

 

[Louise7]

Hello @Shegra and welcome but I’m sorry to hear about your sister. My mum is in a nursing home and it does take time to settle in and get used to a new environment, and your sister has only been there a day so it is still very early days. It’s not just the person who goes into the care home that has to get used to the changes but also their family too, and it isn’t easy. Your niece has her young children to think of, and her mum is safe and looked after, and although it can sometimes take quite a while for someone to settle the staff will have techniques to help your sister to settle more. It might be helpful for your niece to ask the staff how her mum is when she isn’t visiting her as it can be quite common for a family member to get the brunt of any anger / negativity about the care home but for the person to be fine around the staff and other people. Sometimes it can help to stay away for a short while initially, to help with the settling in, so maybe this is something that your niece could discuss with the care staff to see what they recommend? This is a friendly and supportive place with a lot of shared experience so others may have other suggestions, but I’m sure that given time your sister will start to settle.

 

[Gosling]

Hello @Shegra and welcome to this friendly and supportive forum from me too! I am glad you have found us.

I just wanted to echo what @Louise7 has already said really. It took my Mum a while to settle into a care home setting. It does take time for anyone, yet alone a person with dementia, to become acclimatised to new surroundings and settle in. And again, with my Mum, the care home suggested I left it a week before I visited, which was extremely difficult, I have to admit, but in the long run, I think it was the best as by the time I saw her she was certainly quite settled. I hope it is the same with your sister.