New g/f i want to introduce but how?

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by AFF, Mar 22, 2005.

  1. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Hi Aff, again, I agree with Brucie, give your Dad a few days to settle in, then go to see him with a family member or on your own. It is important you get your own head round his being in a home before you add the worry of taking your gf to see him. I know it looks bleak, but it's not all bad. You said yourself that your Mum was not coping too well with it all. The episode with the cat illustrates that she is really a compassionate and caring lady, she is on a knife edge at present, trying to cope with a situation not of her choice or making. It could be that she will miss your Dad greatly, but by being able to hand over much of his care, she will be able to visit and have quality time with him once he is settled in the home. You will be able to do this too. Sadly, as Brucie says, he will gradually forget who you are much of the time, that is the disease and nothing can be done about it. When you go to visit, take him treats and little prompts of his life, photos, music, anything you know he valued that you can take in basically. When you feel more at ease with the situation, that will be the time to take your gf. Make it a fairly short visit and make sure she is aware of what to expect to see beforehand. Try not to be too hard on your Mum, she is going through her own private hell right now, give her a hug, she may not respond, but at least she will know you understand. Thinking of you and sending you a big hug, you are the same age as my son by the way, love She. XX
     

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