Dear PP, I am so sorry to hear your news. Don't be sad that you were not with your Mum in the end. I believe we hold on to our loved ones and don't want to let them go. So sometimes they hold on knowing the pain it will cause us. The night my Mum died I said to her, "It's okay for her to go", I picked her up in my arms kissed her and said goodnight Godbless, knowing I would never feel her warmth again. But you know I was holding on to my Mum because I wanted her with me. I found some beautiful pictures with her smile radiating health and beauty. This was my Mum. I took them today and put them on her coffin. Today was her funeral. I spent a lot of time choosing the readings and hymns that I knew my Mum loved and ensured all the familly played a part. I wanted it to be a celebration of my Mums life. I wrote a tribute to my Mum which I was determined to speak, with the help of my son I managed to give. I have asted a copy below... it may help you Think of your Mum with joy and cherish the memories you have. Maria Do not be sad and mourn our loss, Do not feel guilt for things said, or not said. Instead remember all the fun, the joy and light we had. Her sparkling light, her unconditional gift of love. For our Mum, your Grandma, Aunty and friend had not gone. Something so bright cannot be extinguished. Remember, the holidays, our animals, our home, Remember, the laughter, grandma in Las Vegas in her pink and bling. And if in our sorrow we feel sad and sorry for our loss, remember instead her light and bright smile that lit up our lives. Take just a part of this light and she will be by your side to guide you through life and never leave you. In this way my Mum will live with us forever. So, I will not stand at your grave and weep, For I know you are not there, you did not die. All I must do is look and know you are by my side, I will see your smile in the rising sun, You are in a thousand winds that blow, You are the diamond glints on snow, You are the sun on ripened grain, And the gentle autumn rain. When I awaken in the morning's hush You’re the swift uplifting rush Of quiet birds in circled flight, When I am sad you will be there to wrap your arms around me and make me strong, and if I am cold. give me warmth. I will catch your whisper in the rustling leaves, Glimpse your shadow as you close the door, Mum, my friend, how can I put a lifetime of love into a few words. For now, though, sleep tight. Goodnight Godbless.