1. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    I`m really sorry to be a pain , I feel like I`m having to be spoon fed every step of the way but I don`t know where else to turn.

    Mum isn`t really eating or drinking and I don`t know if its because she has no appetite or if she simply forgets and if its the latter doesn`t her body remind her .

    Danny and I are at our wits end so does anyone have any suggestions how we can get her to eat . Every time we try to tempt her she says yuck!

    Jeanie x x
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,598
    Kent
    Dear jeanie,

    I`m not sure what to say to you. Dhiren eats well and 10 minutes after dinner, asks what we are having for dinner.

    I think his brain no longer tells him his stomach is full. Do you think it could be possible your mother`s brain no longer tells her her stomach is empty?

    Or could it be that she`s depressed. Or has she lost interest in things other than food, or as well as food.

    The only one who can really help would be her doctor. If you can`t tempt her with anything, perhaps the doctor can advise.

    Has she lost weight?

    Love xx
     
  3. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    When was the last time she ate ?
     
  4. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    Hi Sylvia as ever you are always there for me and everyone else.

    She`s actually lost interest in everything , we leave food for her in front of her where she can`t miss it yet its only when we draw her attention to it that she seems to realise and will eat a little.

    Yes she`s lost weight and as for her doctor he doesn`t seem to feel there`s a problem and just seems to want to test her feelings with regard to going into a NH which as muddled as she is fills her with horror.

    I told her today that on friday our cpn Sandra is coming to see us I reassured her that she likes Sandra and her response was " she`s not going to put me anywhere is she ".

    I feel that whether or not she understands what is happening to her she has given up or alternatively she has lost the wherewithal to care for herself.....who knows.

    I`m really very sad ,its my birthday tomorrow and she cannot remember so for the first time ever she won`t ring me in the morning to sing happy birthday in the silly way she always has.......its just a little bit more of her that is disappearing.



    Love Jeanie x x
     
  5. gill@anchorage5

    gill@anchorage5 Registered User

    Apr 29, 2007
    211
    Southampton
    Happy Birthday

    Jeannie - wishing you a happy birthday for tomorrow - isn't it difficult as things progress - hope you manage to do something special for you on your special day.

    Love

    Gill x
     
  6. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,598
    Kent
    Jeanie, is she frightened of going in a home? If she`s frightened she might even feel nauseous. Or she might just feel like giving up.

    I`m so sorry, it must be awful for you, but what more can you do?

    I hope you have some happiness for your birthday tomorrow, even if worrying about your mother puts a dampener on it.

    Is it your 21st.;)

    P.S. Why don`t you enter your birthday on the calendar.
     
  7. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    I`m hoping to have a really good day tomorrow ....honestly wasn`t looking for sympathy .... I`ve bought the dress for Emmas wedding so tomorrow me and my best friend are going into York to buy all the extras like shoes , hat ( maybe ) jewellrey not to mention underwear finishing off with a long lunch with lots of red wine, should be fab !!

    Love Jeanie x x
     
  8. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    Oh Sylvia thanks for the compliment but I am actually 22 now !!

    Love Jeanie x x
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,598
    Kent
    Good. Enjoy it and let us know what you buy, and don`t forget to enter your birthday on the TP calendar.

    Love xx
     
  10. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    Had a quick look on calendar ....do I have to wait til tomorrow to put my birthday on.

    Jeanie x x
     
  11. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,598
    Kent
    No. Just scroll down and follow the instructions. Add new event.
     
  12. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    Hi Sylvia

    I`m obviously persona non grata as it seems i`m not allowed access don`t know what i`ve done but i`ll sort it out some other time.

    Thanks for your help ....maybe I`m just a duffer !

    love Jeanie x x
     
  13. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,598
    Kent
    I had to ask Nada to do it for me, :eek: so don`t feel too bad.
     
  14. alex

    alex Registered User

    Apr 10, 2006
    1,665
    Hi Jeanie

    Sorry your having a tough time at the moment, just wanted to say Happy Birthday, i hope today is a much better day for you.

    Love Alex x
     
  15. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    I must say that I was surprise to read that your only 22 & your mother has dementia

    If you don't mind me asking how old is your mother ?



    Wishing you a Happy birthday
     
  16. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    Oh Margarita I`m really sorry the 22 was a joke. Sylvia made the joke that was I 21 so I just responded ,in reality sadly I`m 55 today ( wish it wasn`t so ) and Mum is 83.

    But today at least I switched off as much as possible , bought a wrap ,shoes and bag for wedding and had a great lunch that actually turned into an early dinner with lots of red wine ( as predicted ).

    Mum didn`t remember that it was my birthday and I`m really sad about that but two of my very best friends went through the rituals we have as a family of ringing to sing happy birthday followed by Hip Hip Hooray 3 times I know it sounds mad but that is what I missed the most and bless them for knowing me so well and separatley ( not knowing each other ) trying to fill the void. So all in all I`ve had a really good birthday.

    Love Jeanie x x

    ps Thanks for you good wishes Alex
     
  17. gill@anchorage5

    gill@anchorage5 Registered User

    Apr 29, 2007
    211
    Southampton
    Good on you - birthday girl!

    Hi Jeanie

    Glad you had a good birthday & that you have good friends to share it with.

    All the best

    Gill x
     
  18. jeanierec

    jeanierec Registered User

    May 7, 2007
    121
    north yorkshire
    Hi Gill

    Where would we be without good friends both on the spot and virtual ......I think one day it would be fab to have " virtual friends reunited " and all of us on TP could get together and make those virtual hugs a reality .....I know it isn`t going to happen `cos what we do with our anything but virtual loved ones that we care so much about.

    Jeanie x x
     

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