Hi - I'm a new member, Marcelle123 - retired with no children and I live with my husband not far from Mum's house. For reasons of my husband's health, I am not thinking of taking my mother into my own home, if and when she can't cope any more. To be honest, I don't think she'd like that anyway. She is increasingly very argumentative. I'm one of a big family but my siblings live a long way away and only two of them visit regularly. My brother owns a portion of my mother's house, and I have an enduring power of attorney for her. The trouble is, I feel a bit helpless. Mum has assets - mainly the house but also some investments - but I know that they'd only last two or three years if she went into a dementia care home. At present she can wash & dress, do housework, get simple meals, and we have contact with her every day, give her lunches, take her shopping etc. I want to have a plan in place for when she can't do these things, but I am unclear about what to do. My brother's mother-in-law funds her own carers, but she keeps falling in her own home & being hospitalised. Mum has always been unsociable and suspicious of outsiders so in some ways it would be best if we just bit the bullet and arranged a home. Is there any professional person we could ask to assess Mum's assets and advise on how to fund a care home, and what allowances she might be able to claim? Would a medical check-up be the first step? Her GP? Or is there a 'step-by-step leaflet' which explains what to do in such a situation. Obviously, living near her, we can hold the fort for a bit. But my husband's health is my first priority, and stress makes his condition worse. This is my first post, but I am also looking forward to reading the other threads. What a great forum - up to now, I've felt very alone, because my siblings don't seem to know any more than I do. Thanks for any help and advice - it will be much appreciated.