Hello Everyone
I have not posted for a while, been really busy sorting out, and getting mum ready to move into the Nursing Home.
Having found a really good NH for mum, the going through mum's assessment, then the trauma of getting it to panel in time that we didnt lose the place we made it. We go the go ahead last Wednesday.
Since then we have been sorting out her flat organising the furniture and personal things she wanted to take with her. Mr brother re painted all her bedroom furniture, I washed and ironed everything she has in the way of clothing (as she would stuff her dirty laundry in with the clean stuff, it all had to be washed). I have ironed for Britain.
We took mum to the home and she liked it, drove me nuts all week asking how much longer she had to wait before she moved etc. etc. We went to and fro the home putting up pictures, moving in everytihing ready, her room looked a real treat.
Bit of a slight trauma her new bed was broken when we tried to put it together, so we moved in her old one, and the company are pulling out all the stops to get us a replacement asap. All going great. Mum rang this morning, yep really looking forward to the move.
My brother picked her up from the flat, my son and I arrived ahead of them at the home armed with flowers, the cakes the likes, biscuits, etc. etc.
Well, she got out of the car looking like a bag lady, (she refused to put on the clean clothes I had organised for her, never mind, she's happy).
Got into her room and she announced she isn't staying. Talk about heart stopping moment, (well 2 hours actually). The staff were fab brought her tea, were really great to her. Then they took her for lunch, and suggested as she was having a right hissy fit with us would be better if we just went. Oh my gosh, it was terrible, I felt awful just doing a runner, and cried all the way home.
I have telephoned the staff every half hour, they have told me she is fine, (apart from the fact she is going to throttle me), she doesn't remember my brother being there or my son, just me, the bad daughter who has left her. Never mind one guilt monster sitting on my shoulder, I have a full set.
The nurse in charge just rang to say all is well with her, she has had afternoon tea, and will be going into dinner soon. But she is sat in an easy chair watching the door waiting for me to come back and take her home.
I am sure loads of you have been through this, and as my brother said we knew it wouldnt be a breeze, but how on earth do you all cope with this. If it wasnt for the fact that she could not stay in her own home anymore and be safe, I would hot foot it back there and pick her up.
Sorry to ramble on, but any advice on how to cope with this would be gratefully accepted, and when do I have the bottle to go and see her without it causing both of us real trauma.
Thanks for listening
Cate
I have not posted for a while, been really busy sorting out, and getting mum ready to move into the Nursing Home.
Having found a really good NH for mum, the going through mum's assessment, then the trauma of getting it to panel in time that we didnt lose the place we made it. We go the go ahead last Wednesday.
Since then we have been sorting out her flat organising the furniture and personal things she wanted to take with her. Mr brother re painted all her bedroom furniture, I washed and ironed everything she has in the way of clothing (as she would stuff her dirty laundry in with the clean stuff, it all had to be washed). I have ironed for Britain.
We took mum to the home and she liked it, drove me nuts all week asking how much longer she had to wait before she moved etc. etc. We went to and fro the home putting up pictures, moving in everytihing ready, her room looked a real treat.
Bit of a slight trauma her new bed was broken when we tried to put it together, so we moved in her old one, and the company are pulling out all the stops to get us a replacement asap. All going great. Mum rang this morning, yep really looking forward to the move.
My brother picked her up from the flat, my son and I arrived ahead of them at the home armed with flowers, the cakes the likes, biscuits, etc. etc.
Well, she got out of the car looking like a bag lady, (she refused to put on the clean clothes I had organised for her, never mind, she's happy).
Got into her room and she announced she isn't staying. Talk about heart stopping moment, (well 2 hours actually). The staff were fab brought her tea, were really great to her. Then they took her for lunch, and suggested as she was having a right hissy fit with us would be better if we just went. Oh my gosh, it was terrible, I felt awful just doing a runner, and cried all the way home.
I have telephoned the staff every half hour, they have told me she is fine, (apart from the fact she is going to throttle me), she doesn't remember my brother being there or my son, just me, the bad daughter who has left her. Never mind one guilt monster sitting on my shoulder, I have a full set.
The nurse in charge just rang to say all is well with her, she has had afternoon tea, and will be going into dinner soon. But she is sat in an easy chair watching the door waiting for me to come back and take her home.
I am sure loads of you have been through this, and as my brother said we knew it wouldnt be a breeze, but how on earth do you all cope with this. If it wasnt for the fact that she could not stay in her own home anymore and be safe, I would hot foot it back there and pick her up.
Sorry to ramble on, but any advice on how to cope with this would be gratefully accepted, and when do I have the bottle to go and see her without it causing both of us real trauma.
Thanks for listening
Cate