Mum hospitalised yesterday, possible dementia?

[fluffster]

Hi,
Okay, I'll try and keep it as concise as I can...

My mother used to drink a LOT. Couldnt stop her as she would just go herself to get more. She was also smoking around 20-30 a day. Always been active and independent but a very awkward, difficult personality.

Three years ago she fell down half of the stairs after drinking and broke her leg. Awful break. Hospitalised. They said she'd be in two weeks. Came home 14 weeks later but after refusing physio/getting out of bed it meant she could barely walk but managed to walk from one room to the next with a zimmer phrame. But, in addition to that, after refusing to get out of bed she became doubly incontinent . My father and I used to sort her pads out but my father also got her an electric scooter for her to have some independence but, it just meant she could still go and get more drink . We shouldn't really have got the scooter but before he bought it, as she was able to walk (albeit slowly) she would still manage to get to the corner shop to buy more. Apart from restraining her, we couldnt stop it.

Went back for a review of the surgery she'd had on her broken leg as they'd put a plate in. When she had the plate put in they said that it would be removed after a year or two after the bone had regrown. Consultant said that after two years there was hardly any bone regrowth due to the amount she was smoking. They said that the plate they put in was to support the leg while the bone was growing back but as it wasn't growing back the plate could fail at any time. BUT, they couldn't take the plate out as there wasn't enough bone regrowth. Combined with the lack of bone regrowth due to smoking they weren't prepared to do anything. She either had to stop smoking or they wouldnt do anything. My mother would not stop so she just struggled along but the leg was painful.

This carried on for a few years but, the last two years (when she was 71) she started to show signs of short term memory loss. Repeatedly asking questions she'd only asked a few minutes before.
Ok, last December, she had a stroke. Got her to A&E within an hour or two. They gave her clot busting drugs but, long story short, she almost totally recovered but there is an ever so slight droop in her face (if you didn't know, you wouldnt know if you know what I mean). But, it was the same side as her broken leg.
Stayed in hospital for 3 months. Came home on 1st Feb.
By now, she couldnt walk as the stroke had affected her mobility combined with the painful leg.
Doubly incontinent plus can't walk so carers were coming in four times a day to change her (hospital wouldnt allow her home unless care was in place)

She's been aggressive and abusive towards the carers. I think her short term memory has gone worse since the stroke and she forgets they're coming so when they walk in they surprise her and strip her off to clean her up. She shouts and swears and lashes out. She's always been difficult and never been afraid to tell people what they think of them (result is she has no friends!)
Carers reported her behaviour.
Doctor and district nurse came and said she needed to go in for a "day or two" for assessments . They said it may be that she has onset of dementia so they recommended going in and they'd do medication tests to see if something would help.

Went in yesterday and they called us in saying that they were impementing DOLS - deprivation of liberty safeguard as they thought she didnt have the capacity and was a danger to herself and others. My father is 81 so I'm wondering if they're trying to protect him too?

They said the tests would possibly take 6 weeks. maybe more, maybe less. We feel we've been misled as they told us a day or two but now they're saying 6 weeks.

We set up a POA years ago but I'm just wondering if we're doing the right thing? Does DOLS override a POA?

Sorry, that went on a lot longer than I thought.

TIA

 

[marionq]

Hello Fluffster. My guess is your heads clearer now you have written all that down. Your Mumsounds a right handful and she is getting a lot of help considering her self destructive nature. If I were you and your Dad I would breathe a sigh of relief and leave it to the experts. The two of you should have a wee break.

Good wishes.

 

[Mannie]

Hi,
Okay, I'll try and keep it as concise as I can...

My mother used to drink a LOT. Couldnt stop her as she would just go herself to get more. She was also smoking around 20-30 a day. Always been active and independent but a very awkward, difficult personality.

Three years ago she fell down half of the stairs after drinking and broke her leg. Awful break. Hospitalised. They said she'd be in two weeks. Came home 14 weeks later but after refusing physio/getting out of bed it meant she could barely walk but managed to walk from one room to the next with a zimmer phrame. But, in addition to that, after refusing to get out of bed she became doubly incontinent . My father and I used to sort her pads out but my father also got her an electric scooter for her to have some independence but, it just meant she could still go and get more drink . We shouldn't really have got the scooter but before he bought it, as she was able to walk (albeit slowly) she would still manage to get to the corner shop to buy more. Apart from restraining her, we couldnt stop it.

Went back for a review of the surgery she'd had on her broken leg as they'd put a plate in. When she had the plate put in they said that it would be removed after a year or two after the bone had regrown. Consultant said that after two years there was hardly any bone regrowth due to the amount she was smoking. They said that the plate they put in was to support the leg while the bone was growing back but as it wasn't growing back the plate could fail at any time. BUT, they couldn't take the plate out as there wasn't enough bone regrowth. Combined with the lack of bone regrowth due to smoking they weren't prepared to do anything. She either had to stop smoking or they wouldnt do anything. My mother would not stop so she just struggled along but the leg was painful.

This carried on for a few years but, the last two years (when she was 71) she started to show signs of short term memory loss. Repeatedly asking questions she'd only asked a few minutes before.
Ok, last December, she had a stroke. Got her to A&E within an hour or two. They gave her clot busting drugs but, long story short, she almost totally recovered but there is an ever so slight droop in her face (if you didn't know, you wouldnt know if you know what I mean). But, it was the same side as her broken leg.
Stayed in hospital for 3 months. Came home on 1st Feb.
By now, she couldnt walk as the stroke had affected her mobility combined with the painful leg.
Doubly incontinent plus can't walk so carers were coming in four times a day to change her (hospital wouldnt allow her home unless care was in place)

She's been aggressive and abusive towards the carers. I think her short term memory has gone worse since the stroke and she forgets they're coming so when they walk in they surprise her and strip her off to clean her up. She shouts and swears and lashes out. She's always been difficult and never been afraid to tell people what they think of them (result is she has no friends!)
Carers reported her behaviour.
Doctor and district nurse came and said she needed to go in for a "day or two" for assessments . They said it may be that she has onset of dementia so they recommended going in and they'd do medication tests to see if something would help.

Went in yesterday and they called us in saying that they were impementing DOLS - deprivation of liberty safeguard as they thought she didnt have the capacity and was a danger to herself and others. My father is 81 so I'm wondering if they're trying to protect him too?

They said the tests would possibly take 6 weeks. maybe more, maybe less. We feel we've been misled as they told us a day or two but now they're saying 6 weeks.

We set up a POA years ago but I'm just wondering if we're doing the right thing? Does DOLS override a POA?

Sorry, that went on a lot longer than I thought.

TIA

So sorry for all you are going through , it must be so difficult and worrying, don't worry about a long post, it is good to say what is on your mind.

It sounds a very difficult situation, however the good part is that the NhS are assessing her. since there sounds like there may be multiple problems , then it sounds good that they are giving time to stabilise her ,so that they can understand the causes. They will likely try some meds but they need time to check how they are working, and meanwhile do more extensive checks on her general health.

I would suggest asking her consultant for a meeting where they can explain what they have found so far and what their plan is for the next week or so.....you don't need to feel in the dark. You can show them the PO A document. You could request a meeting without your mum being present if it would help.


Also this interval will give your father and you some respite.

You can maybe relax slightly knowing she is in the best hands, and if not done yet , turn your attention to your dad, has he had a Carers assessment yet, if not, ask his GP for help with getting one. Same for yourself ,if you have not had one yet.

Hope things are now on the up for you.

 

[Shedrech]

Hi fluffster
welcome to TP - I'm glad you found the forum and were able to get all of that written down and off your chest - and here's the perfect place to do both
quite a woman, your mum!
sounds to me as though she's in exactly the right place for her - in the assessment centre she'll be safe, have a lot of attention and support and be assessed carefully to see what needs she has and how they can best be met in the future
it may be that they weren't sure what they were facing before she went in, and now they realise they will need quite a bit of time to help here - and they will certainly take into account your dad's situation too
the DOLS is a Safeguarding measure that any institution must put in place in these circumstances, so it is actually a support to you
I appreciate how worried you and your dad will be, however I wholeheartedly agree with marionq, take this time to recuperate yourselves - you have clearly been supporting your mum and your dad amazingly over the years - now have a rest, recharge your batteries - allow the medics to support your mum
and do keep posting, it helps to get your thoughts out in the open - and there are many here who will recognise your experiences
best wishes to you all

 

[jaymor]

When someone goes into an assessment unit it is because there are big problems that no one has been able to sort out. They have to see and assess over time, the behaviour, the way the person reacts, and then the right way to help them. It can't be done in days, sometimes can't be done in weeks.

We spent years with my husband being handed medication and left to try it for a couple of months. Then when it didn't work trying something else for a couple of months. We could Go 12 months with nothing changing.

After 7 years he was admitted to an assessment unit, 9 weeks it took to sort him but sort him they did and he entered a nursing home no longer tormented by the disease. Yes he still had many problems but he was dealing with them so much better. How much better life would have been for him if he had been admitted years earlier he could have returned home in a much better place dementia wise and we would not have had all those dark, dark times we had to endure.

So accept the help and the length of time it takes and as others have said, rejoice in the DOLS it is there to safeguard your Dad not to make him a prisoner. My husband was covered by a DOLS for many years.

 

[Beate]

Instead of being aggrieved about a six weeks' stay to check her over and sort out medication, you should be relieved that the right thing is being done to help your Mum. She has multiple health problems and combined with an unwillingness to accept help isn't an easy case to care for, so it will take some time to sort out.

They might decide that carers at home are not adequate anymore and she needs to go into a specialised home. If her behaviour and understanding are seriously impaired you might be able to apply for CHC funding. If she was sectioned under section 3, she would be eligible for section 117 aftercare.

A DOLS is standard in care homes and hospitals and just ensures they are legally able to keep her there if she hasn't the mental capacity to understand why she is there. It is to keep her safe and has nothing whatsoever to do with a POA. They can happily co-exist.

 

[fluffster]

Well, she's been in a week and we have a diagnosis.

Mixed dementia

For a few years she's been repeating questions she's only just asked so we knew that she probably had Alzheimers which they have now confirmed. But, in addition to that, she has vascular dementia caused by the stroke on top of Alzheimers which equates to Mixed Dementia.

Anyone know rough life expectancy? I've been googling and Alzheimers is approx 10 years from first signs. Vascular dementia is approx 5 years but possibly less due to risk of further strokes. But I can't seem to find an answer on life expectancy on Mixed Dementia.
I expect it means its dramatically reduced due to the effects of both

 

[fluffster]

Forgot to thank all the replies.

really did help us feel less guilty and that she was definitely in the right place last week.

also helps us for the future too. In case she needs to be sectioned at some point.

Thank you

 

[marionq]

It's the old length of a piece of string answer. Most of us I expect have read up on the stages of dementia to try and figure this one out. Because my husband's pattern of Alz follows that of his grandfather,father and brothers the ages of death were as follows 91, 86, 85, 85, 84. John is now 83 and in good health apart from a damaged knee. I would bet on him at least matching his grandfather at 91 but who knows.

 

[cragmaid]

My Mum died last year, about 8 years or so from formal diagnosis of Mixed Dementia, however she also had a cancer and other age related ailments. She was nearly 88 years old. She had been ill for at least 10 years.

There all sorts of factors that will influence your mother's prognosis, circulation, heart, lungs and liver will have been affected by her drinking and smoking and will probably cause her other problems.
There is no definitive answer about length of life.

 

[Spamar]

OH died last year, also 8 years on from formal diagnosis. However, he'd had it for several years (4?, more?) before that. Due to circumstances, protracted house moving, we waited until we were established, more or less, in the new house before sorting a diagnosis. It was no surprise, both his father and sister and my father had had Alzheimer's, although OH had mixed.