Moving mum to another Care home .. help?!

Discussion in 'Welcome and how to use Dementia Talking Point' started by Emma HB, Jul 15, 2019.

  1. Emma HB

    Emma HB New member

    Jul 15, 2019
    1
    Hello

    I am new so hope I am doing this correctly. I would be extremely grateful for any advice and/or experience of moving mum from current care home where I am not happy with the care to another home. Mum says she doesnt want to love but I dont believe she really understands, most.of thentime she thinks shes out and about doing all sorts. I have 4 sisters and 1 of them feels we can only move mum if she agrees which is unlikely. Mum is bed bound and has to be hoisted in and out of bed and in a wheelchair. Any insight would be most welcome.

    Thank you
    Emma
     
  2. Helly68

    Helly68 Registered User

    Mar 12, 2018
    370
    Emma - you don't say if you have LPA or any other indication of your mother's level of capacity?

    It would seem from what you say that you don't believe she is able to make an informed decision as to whether to stay or go to the other home.

    It sounds as though you need to talk to your sisters, is the one who is wanting your mother to consent being realistic?
    I think with these kind of moves, if the PWD isn't able to advocate for themselves, then it is usually a balance between the upheaval of a move, the issues that have led you to want to move her and the possible benefits of a new home. Not easy. I wish you all the best.

    NB when my Mum now says (rarely) that she wants to go "home" she means her childhood home, with her now dead parents. Sometimes the wish to stay where you are is more about fear of what is happening in terms of disease progression or the wish to return to a happier time. Sadly pretty impossible to achieve, but there are good care homes out there.
     
  3. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    16,057
    Toronto, Canada
    What are the problems with the care which make you want to move your mother? Would it be at all possible to have a meeting and sorting things out? As @Helly68 asked, do you or someone else have LPA?

    I must say that a PWD agreeing or not to something is not necessarily germane.
     

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