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Live in care or care home?


Registered User
Jun 12, 2015
My mum refuses to go to a care home but is becoming a risk to herself. I am struggling to find good live in care that does not involve new people every two weeks. Can anyone give me any advice?


Registered User
Oct 23, 2014
Hi Hutton, I tried really hard to keep my Mum in her own home but the practicalities were impossible. She was simply a danger to herself and others. Also, I spoke to several people who had employed agencies to look after their loved-ones but continuity of staff and care is difficult. Would it perhaps be worth advertising for a live-in companion for your mum? Despite going against my mum's wishes, she is now in a residential home and is safe. I could do no more. Hope you manage to find a solution. D x

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Registered User
Oct 8, 2009
Herefordshire UK
Hello Hutton

Just wanted to welcome you to the forum.

I haven't had any experience of carers coming into the home. My Mum lived with me and hubby, and she went to the day care three times a week (which she loved) when her dementia got worse and she needed 24/7 I was very lucky that we managed to get a place in the same care home (as the day care and respite care).

I never told her that she was going into permanent care, and I feel bad about it, but I know she would have refused. ( I think most of us would prefer not to go into a care home.)

It's a very difficult and upsetting time for all concerned. Have you tried getting your Mum to one of the Day Care places to start with and you will be able to see how she manages it. Possibly trying respite care for a week or two?