1. Our next Q&A session is on the topic of Christmas and dementia.This time we want our Q&A to involve our resident experts, you! Share tips and advice on navigating Christmas here in this thread.

    Pop by and post your questions or if you prefer you can email your question to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

Lasting power of attorney advice if poss

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Amazing Annie 2, Aug 25, 2015.

  1. Amazing Annie 2

    Amazing Annie 2 Registered User

    Jul 7, 2014
    8
    Thank you all for earlier advice.
    My parents have asked my sister and I to be their POA's, My Dad has Alzheimer's.
    When papers arrived for signing my sister and I were surprised to see that Mum and dad have each other as POA's too. we all can act jointly and severally.
    They are wanting to help them with bills etc and both have capacity, dad just forgets alot in his early stages.

    As we begin to help them we are worried if we step in to do something dad may agree , then forget and then undo anything if he gets worried about it afterwards. Quite often he is calling services etc to check things that he has done already.

    I have asked the solicitor her opinion and she states it keeps some independence for folk after laws changed, that my dad can still access his affairs in any case and we should sit down as a family to discuss it all. we are about to do that,but my sister thinks we should ask them to remove themselves or at least dad but I feel uncomfortable doing that.

    Has anyone else heard of such arrangements being made? Thanks for any help, much appreciated, Annie
     
  2. Bod

    Bod Registered User

    Aug 30, 2013
    1,182
    POA's are there to allow you to help them. Having mirror POA's is pointless.
    If you haven't already signed, make out new ones without parents names.
    If they are already registered, your Dad may forget totally that he is one.
    I think you could have him removed, on grounds of not being able to act, but please check with the Office of the Public Guardian.

    Bod
     
  3. jenniferpa

    jenniferpa Volunteer Moderator

    Jun 27, 2006
    39,438
    I don't think it's that uncommon, particularly when one party is resistant to the whole LPA idea. By doing it this way, you get over the whole paranoia issue. Provided you are able to act jointly and severally there really shouldn't be an issue. With regard to your point about him undoing things that have been done, if we are talking about after you have registered the LPA where he is a donor: well he won't be able to, at least no more than he could anyway. When an LPA is registered and the donor has lost capacity, he can no longer act for himself. Of course if you registered it early, then he can (just like anyone else).

    If your concern relates to your mother, and what happens if you have to register and use her LPA, if your father doesn't have capacity you can use the LPA without him, assuming it's jointly and severally.
     
  4. nitram

    nitram Registered User

    Apr 6, 2011
    19,264
    Male
    North Manchester
    FWIW my wife and I had mirror LPAs with our 3 children acting as joint and several replacement attorneys in each case.
     
  5. Long-Suffering

    Long-Suffering Registered User

    Jul 6, 2015
    425
    On my dad's POA me and mum are the attorneys, and on my mum's me and dad (though obviously he won't be able to make any decisions). We can act jointly and severally. We did it this way even though practically we knew dad wouldn't be able to act as attorney because it made it seem a lot fairer and not as if we were just "targeting" him.

    LS
     
  6. LynneMcV

    LynneMcV Volunteer Moderator

    May 9, 2012
    3,651
    south-east London
    #6 LynneMcV, Aug 26, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2015
    My husband and I have exactly the same arrangement. He is on my POA along with my children, acting jointly and severally and I am on his POA with our children acting jointly and severally.

    I continue to handle all our finances and my husband continues to have plenty of input. So far my children haven't had to do anything, but the plan was to have them in place in case either one of us needed help.

    I and my husband would be more than a little miffed if either of our children started suggesting one or other or both of us should be removed from the POA arrangement. At this time it is about them being able to support us in carrying out our financial wishes should we, for whatever reason, find we are temporarily or permanently unable to do things ourselves.

    As your parents' POAs have you and your sister added jointly and severally, there shouldn't be an issue.

    The POA is about helping the donor continue making and carrying out financial transactions - and continuing to make the decisions once the person no longer has capacity, but to do so, keeping in mind what the person's preferences are rather than what you feel they should be.

    For instance in our cases, the children know which charities to donate to, they know we want to overpay on the mortgage wherever possible, invest in premium bonds not stocks and shares. The also know that my husband wants to maintain his regular DD for football pools (yes, we think it is a waste of money, but it is something he has always done and something we will continue to enable him to do).

    Your parents have made their POAs the way they want them to be, the solicitor has confirmed that it isn't unusual, so please feel happy that things are as they should be xxx :)
     
  7. Amazing Annie 2

    Amazing Annie 2 Registered User

    Jul 7, 2014
    8
    Thank you Bod
     
  8. Amazing Annie 2

    Amazing Annie 2 Registered User

    Jul 7, 2014
    8
    Thanks Jennifer, it hasnt been registered yet, your reply echoes what I thought was my understanding, ie its enabling not taking over control (which I think is what my sister would like tbh, she's the more risk averse of us all) Thanks again Annie
     
  9. Amazing Annie 2

    Amazing Annie 2 Registered User

    Jul 7, 2014
    8
    Thank you Lynne, your experience has really helped me,Annie
     
  10. Amazing Annie 2

    Amazing Annie 2 Registered User

    Jul 7, 2014
    8
    Thank you, that feels so supportive, really helpful to me too, Annie
     
  11. Amazing Annie 2

    Amazing Annie 2 Registered User

    Jul 7, 2014
    8
    Thank you! that's really helpful and very worth it to me
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.