Hip operation

[upsanddownsdays]

My mum fell in her carehome and broke her hip two weeks ago . It's been very traumatic for her ( and us ) but she's back at the carehome now .
How do others cope with the mental anguish of watching their loved one keep picking themselves up after UTIs , falls , delirium etc ? My heart breaks and I find it so upsetting . Mum is so brave , never cries , but I'm finding it harder to watch her suffer this .
She forgets she's broken her hip and is very agitated about the hoist , not sure if that's fear or what . I had to sit with her for a couple of hours to calm her down at the carehome the other day .
Just look at my strong mum and think she doesn't deserve this .
How do others cope ? Xx

 

[Grannie G]

Hello @upsanddownsdays

I agree how heartbreaking it is to watch your mum suffer. You are suffering as much as she is, if not more.

There is no way out I`m afraid. All you can do is your best and try not to leave yourself with any regrets.

 

[upsanddownsdays]

Now my husband and I have come down with COVID . Obviously run down with all the hospital visits .
Feeling very rough , so grateful my mum is in a good carehome so I can stay in bed feeling like this .

To all others battling with the worry of whether to put their love one in care , do it , in times like this , we would be in such a pickle with mum post operative and us both ill too , and no back up. Not sure how we'd have coped . Makes you realise it was the right decision . Xx

 

[Grannie G]

What a relief you can both rest and recuperate @upsanddownsdays.

It was something I was constantly worrying about when my husband was at home with me. Once he was in residential care at least it was one worry over.

Get well soon.

 

[upsanddownsdays]

Thank you
But you still feel guilty you are unable to visit ! Whatever way you look at it it's impossible to feel ok xx

 

[SherwoodSue]

It is the lurching from crisis to crisis which is emotionally wearing. When things are stable I struggle to enjoy the relative calm as I am like a meerkat trying to detect signs of the next acute event.
Sounds like it is similar for you?

 

[upsanddownsdays]

Oh my word yes !!!! That's exactly it , you get one thing sorted then encounter another . It's anticipatory anxiety .
Think that's why we got COVID we are mentally and physically exhausted . So how do you live you own life and be happy with this hovering in the back ground ? Xx