Hi. New to Forum. Hallucinations

[GypsyLady]

Hi all. My husband has been diagnosed with dementia. His mother died from it. He's been progressively getting worse since last spring. I have him on all sorts of medications and he's quieted down a lot. Last month he was constantly packing bags to leave for 'home' and hallucinating that people 'living in our house' were trying to kill him. A nighttime sleep sedative has made life so much better and upping his meds (he takes quetiapine) has made him a little more rational but he somehow he has split me into two personas. He sometimes calls the phone to speak to his other wife and I can't get him to understand that there is only one of me. Anybody had this experience? How do you manage it? Thanks for your help.

 

[canary]

Hello @GypsyLady and welcome to the forum

he somehow he has split me into two personas. He sometimes calls the phone to speak to his other wife and I can't get him to understand that there is only one of me

This is called reduplicative paramnesia and is common in dementia. It is due to damage in the brain and there is little you can do about it - you wont be able to convince him that he is wrong. It is very upsetting, but try and accept that his brain is not working properly and just be very vague when he wants to know where the "other you" is. Perhaps just say that she will be back soon

 

[Neveradullday!]

Hello @GypsyLady
All the things you speak of are very common. Hallucinations - they can be actual hallucinations, misperceptions (mistaking a jacket on a chair for a person, for instance) or just the idea that other people are in the house. I've had all this with my mum.

Thinking I'm two (and more) different people, aswell. She once wanted to phone my dad to ask him where I was. At that time I didn't know the best approach was not to challenge her. It didn't go well - she became insistent I was my brother (I don't have one) with the same name.

As @canary says - being vague is the way to go, my mum now normally thinks I'm a kind helper (but different ones at different times).

Regarding the hallucinations /misperceptions /wrong ideas - again, I've found it best not to challenge, be vague. A nod can sometimes suffice.
But in the case of thinking the 'people' in the house want to kill him - I would definitely reassure that no one wants to kill him.

It becomes the new way of living, both sufferer and carer get used to it.
Regarding being rational - I've found this completely goes with a PWD - it's just something I have to accept.

Best wishes.