Registered User
Jan 19, 2006
we are at stage 6/7 .could do with a hug. worried he may have moved one more stage on .hope its only a chest infection . and we get some more time ,god willing. bit lonaly at presant. love him to bits. do not do restbite. he as lewy bodies. eperlepy . any ideas!!!


Registered User
Jan 4, 2006
Hiya Roann,
One big hug coming in your direction. In the morning I will try to get this moved to the main forum, where you will get more responses. My mum had a chest infection recently, really dragged her down, but the antibiotics have worked. Hope that you get the time that you want.
Love Helen

Noticed it is already in main forum so will leave this put.
Last edited:


Registered User
Nov 25, 2006
Big cyber hug

Hello Roann. I joined this forum today and this is my first message. I'd like to send
great big cyber hugs to you.


Registered User
Oct 9, 2003
Birmingham Hades
Hi Gergina- cymru
welcome to talking point,you have just joined a big family.
Tell us a litle about yourself,there is plenty of advice and support here.
Best wishes

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Oh dear Roann, you sound so low. I wonder if the onset of winter is making it harder for all of us, there seems to be a general air of depression in so many posts just now. The dark days and early evenings, as well as a long winter to face are not the brightest of times to look forward to. Then with Christmas approaching and TV commercials showing everyone having a good time, and we can only look on, and continue to try to make the best of a sad and sorry time.
Love to everyone. It`s hard but it has to be faced. At least we have each other. Sylvia


Registered User
Aug 16, 2006
so familiar

respite was taboo to mum ( dad with ad) and to us the better care is at home there is help out there if things are at the stage my dad is at.... you need your voice to be heard, the help will always wish it had came sooner


Registered User
Apr 30, 2006
Hi Roann
I hope things have improved a bit for you
Mum had a chest infection recently and it really knocked her for 6.......I think she has deteriorated since but she's certainly better than she was
love xx


Registered User
Nov 25, 2006
Norman said:
Hi Gergina- cymruwelcome to talking point,you have just joined a big family.Tell us a litle about yourself,there is plenty of advice and support here.
Best wishes Norman
Thank you for the welcome Norman. I forgot to bookmark this site and it's taken me awhile to find it again. Thank goodness I wrote down my username and password! I usually forget to do it.

My father (75) was recently diagnosed with alzheimers and other forms of demetia. I don't have the full details, dad is in the care of my brother and his wife. They don't speak to me because I don't care for the way they speak to dad. It's sad enough to see my dad like this, (he's always been my hero) but hearing my nephews and nieces speaking to him in a derogatory way, (which I feel is nothing less than bullying) really annoys me...and sometimes I can't prevent myself from giving them glaring looks. They have taken dad to live with them, away from his home and his daily life. Now they are emptying my parents home, selling everything apparently to pay for dad to go to a day care centre 2 or 3 days of the week.
When the house is sold, dad is taking them all on a lovely long holiday apparently.
How nice for them all.
Dad was taken into hospital a few weeks ago with a nasty chest infection (he had quad heart bypass surgery about 10 or so years ago) When my son went to visit dad in hospital, he found my brother and family sitting by an empty bed. They told him that dad was in the toilet. After 10 mins, my son went to check the gents toilets and dad was nowhere to be seen. He had left the hospital (at 8pm) on a cold wet night wearing just pyjama bottoms and slippers. He walked to my brothers house a mile away. Looks like he went to Asda on the way because he had a plastic carrier bag with a dozen bottles of cough mixture and some anti sickness pills. (how he got them when he had no cash is worrying.

Dad is *supposed* to have a social worker but I doubt very much if this person is real. He has never contacted me even though my brother has apparently given him my name address and phone number so that I can voice my concerns about dad's care..

I could write a book on the family troubles....but at the moment, all I care about is my dad. He managed to escape from my brothers house a few days ago and he went to my son's home and asked him to telephone me and pass on a message for me to meet dad at mum's grave and to take my camera. (he gets some comfort from going to the grave and taking photo's) Dad didn't have any money, nor did he have his bus pass so he couldn't get on the bus. My son brought him to see me, which apparently messed up dad's routine. It was several hours before my brother knew dad was missing. When he heard dad was at my house, he went ballistic and accused me of causing problems because dad missed taking his medication (he told me there was no treatment for alzheimers so I had no idea dad was supposed to take regular medication. (my brother is also a liar so I don't know if he is telling me the truth,)
It's a very stressful situation, and I miss seeing dad, I know he misses me too.

Well I have my granddaughter here. She misses seeing her great grandad too.
She was with me at my parents home when mum collapsed and died very suddenly. She's only 7 years old...and she worries that the same thing will happen to my dad..
warm regards


Registered User
May 14, 2006
Dear Georgie,
It seems that you are in a very unhappy situation and you lack information about your father's condition. Would it be possible for you to contact the Social Services and voice your concerns, or simply ask for information so that you know how best to support your brother's family?
It seems strange that nobody took any action, when an elderly man left hospital inadequately dressed and lacking money. He must have been very confused and unhappy at the time and it should have been investigated. The Day Centre staff might also be able to give you information about your father's level of dementia. Perhaps you should contact a solicitor if you have concerns about your father's financial affairs. I hope you can settle your differences with your brother and agree on the best way to care for your father in the future.


Registered User
Feb 24, 2006
Action on Elder Abuse Call our helpline UK: 0808 808 8141

might be able to help.