Hi, I've just joined to try and get some support.
My nan had a heart attack last Oct and got very confused in hospital. Prior to that she was very forgetful, but in hospital it was total disorientation etc.
Whilst she was in hosp. I managed to clean her home and found out just how disorganised and filthy it was
It became apparent that this fiercley independant lady had coverd up quite a bit even to us, her close family.
Since being at home she remebers where she lives and is more orientated, however, she is dreadfully forgetful, which has been dangerous at times.
We got her meds put in to a nomad as ther is no way she could remember what to take and we doubt she'd taken her meds correctly before October either Carers go in to give her the meds, but she has twice taken them herself and thus overdosed on them
My mum is now an appointee, so gets her pension paid in to an account for her. My mum and I shop, cook, clean, take her to appointments etc, but at times she forgets and demands that she get her pension or be taken to get food as she 'has none', despite mum and I knowing she does.
This is why I am sad. Last week I called in to get her lunch as either mum or I do. She was waiting to go shopping. Since her heart attack she has been shopping twice. The week before she nearly collapsed and I struggled to get her back to the car, so decided it wasn't a good idea to try that again! However, nan was adament she was able to do this. She said the reason for being unwell the week before was that she had been out before we went shopping / caught the bus and met me there / i took her to the wrong supermarket. The 1st two reasons are not true. I did however take her to a different supermarket.However, this did not cause her to nearly collapse, her heart did!
She threatened to get on the bus if I did not take her. At the same time she could not think what she wanted from the shops. The truth being she didn't need a thing!
I did take her as I was scared she'd try and catch a bus and all the way round (her prefered ) supermarket I kept saying no you have that, you don't need that etc, to the point where she got so cross with me and put 3 things in the trolley just so she had bought something.
At this point she was ready to collapse.
This became my fault for rushing her. She couldn't find what she wanted because it was my fault too
The final straw when I was getting her home was that she said she'd never ask me to do anything again and that I do nothing for her anyway
I took her home and had to leave to get home for my children. I cried all the way home
I hate that we argued over shopping, I'm scared she'll try and do something stupid, I'm annoyed she thinks I do nothing for her and so sad that she blamed me.
I know I'm not alone. My husband (his father has been dx with Alzheimers) could only reassure me that it's not her, it's her illness, although she doesn't have a dx yet. She refused to accept that she has a problem when the Dr visited, but now has an appt to the memory clinic on 12th.
I'm just glad to have got that out and so sorry it was such a long ramble
My nan had a heart attack last Oct and got very confused in hospital. Prior to that she was very forgetful, but in hospital it was total disorientation etc.
Whilst she was in hosp. I managed to clean her home and found out just how disorganised and filthy it was
It became apparent that this fiercley independant lady had coverd up quite a bit even to us, her close family.
Since being at home she remebers where she lives and is more orientated, however, she is dreadfully forgetful, which has been dangerous at times.
We got her meds put in to a nomad as ther is no way she could remember what to take and we doubt she'd taken her meds correctly before October either Carers go in to give her the meds, but she has twice taken them herself and thus overdosed on them
My mum is now an appointee, so gets her pension paid in to an account for her. My mum and I shop, cook, clean, take her to appointments etc, but at times she forgets and demands that she get her pension or be taken to get food as she 'has none', despite mum and I knowing she does.
This is why I am sad. Last week I called in to get her lunch as either mum or I do. She was waiting to go shopping. Since her heart attack she has been shopping twice. The week before she nearly collapsed and I struggled to get her back to the car, so decided it wasn't a good idea to try that again! However, nan was adament she was able to do this. She said the reason for being unwell the week before was that she had been out before we went shopping / caught the bus and met me there / i took her to the wrong supermarket. The 1st two reasons are not true. I did however take her to a different supermarket.However, this did not cause her to nearly collapse, her heart did!
She threatened to get on the bus if I did not take her. At the same time she could not think what she wanted from the shops. The truth being she didn't need a thing!
I did take her as I was scared she'd try and catch a bus and all the way round (her prefered ) supermarket I kept saying no you have that, you don't need that etc, to the point where she got so cross with me and put 3 things in the trolley just so she had bought something.
At this point she was ready to collapse.
This became my fault for rushing her. She couldn't find what she wanted because it was my fault too
The final straw when I was getting her home was that she said she'd never ask me to do anything again and that I do nothing for her anyway
I took her home and had to leave to get home for my children. I cried all the way home
I hate that we argued over shopping, I'm scared she'll try and do something stupid, I'm annoyed she thinks I do nothing for her and so sad that she blamed me.
I know I'm not alone. My husband (his father has been dx with Alzheimers) could only reassure me that it's not her, it's her illness, although she doesn't have a dx yet. She refused to accept that she has a problem when the Dr visited, but now has an appt to the memory clinic on 12th.
I'm just glad to have got that out and so sorry it was such a long ramble