Hello Everyone, i'm new here

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by freefairy, Nov 2, 2004.

  1. freefairy

    freefairy Registered User

    Nov 2, 2004
    31
    Colchester
    Hello All

    I'm new here and i'd like to introduce myself.
    I'm a 34 single mum of 2 wonderful kids, i have a part time job caring for people with learning disabilities, i also support both of my parents.
    My dad has been diagnosed with alzheimers for over 4 years now and things are getting quite tough, although i have a great bunch of friends who i can offload too, but i feel i need to chat to others in the same boat as myself.
    I'd like to have a rant and rave sometimes when i am in need and also be here to listen to others when they need to offload too.

    Well, this is me and i look forward to chatting to you :)

    Freefairy
     
  2. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Hi Freefairy and welcome to talking point. You can rant and rave as much as you want here, we all do! Hope you find the support and advice you need on this rocky road of carers for those with Alzheimers and the other dementias. Take a look at our resources and fact sheets for basic guidance, then rant/ask away for the nitty grittys and for soulmates in times of need. Does your Dad live on his own, in a home, or with you? We have carers in all these boats so you need never feel alone. We are always here, some are early birds whilst others are night owls, so you will never be left long without a reply. Love She. XX
     
  3. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hello and welcome!

    I guess we have all been through the process where, at first, we think we can handle this challenge. We get used to tweaking our life to fit the new direction our spouse or parent is taking, and over time it may seem to become almost normal.

    But this is a progressive thing, and there will come that day when things have gone one step too far. Maybe something draws our attention to how things have changed drastically, or maybe a new element comes into the equation - perhaps falls, or anxiety, sundowning, loss of ability. Maybe trying to hold everything together simply gets too much of a problem - especially if there are others, children, to care for.

    It helps absolutely to know there are others who have been along the same path, and who can share their experiences.

    I do hope you find Talking Point helps you.
     
  4. Jude

    Jude Registered User

    Dear Freefairy,

    Welcome to TP. Look forward to reading your posts and getting to know you. Not much to add at this stage as all seems to have been well covered by Sheila and Brucie.

    Very best wishes,

    Jude
     
  5. freefairy

    freefairy Registered User

    Nov 2, 2004
    31
    Colchester
    How lovely to hear from others in the same boat, there's only so much understanding friends can do isn't there, which is why i am here i guess.

    My dad has just turned 66, and i believe he has had the disease for a number of years before being diagnosed.
    Dad lives with my mum. My mum is partially sighted (blind in one eye and only has 12% vision in the other)
    At first my dad was my mums eyes and my mum was my dads memory, but as he has become much more dependant and mums depression has become worse, i have felt more and more alone.
    I do have a sister but although she lives in the same town she 'keeps away', i guess we all cope in our own way.

    I will take a look at the fact sheets, do you know if there are any aimed at children of the ages of 7 and 11, they know grandad has alzheimers and he will never get well again, but having something for them would be great.

    I'm off to do a bit of research, chat to you all soon

    Bye for now and thank you
    Freefairy
     
  6. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Dear Freefairy,
    welcome to our family circle,all in the same boat,more or less.
    I note you say your Sister "keeps away"that's not unusual,often friends and relatives vanish at an alarming rate when AD arrives.
    Best Wishes
    Norman
     
  7. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Dear Freefairy fact sheet 515 is about explaining to children, you may find it helpful. I did find a booklet a while ago but I think it went out of print. Nada may be able to help with that if you are interested, I know it was still available to down load a couple of years ago but not sure about now. It was called "The milk is in the oven" and was by the mental health council. I think the IT address was http://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/html/content/bkmilkoven.crm Hope you can find it, love She. XX
     
  8. barraf

    barraf Registered User

    Mar 27, 2004
    308
    Huddersfield
    Dear Freefairy

    I wouldn't worry unduly about your children, beyond explaining as you obviously already have about AD.

    Generally speaking children adapt and accept AD in their close relatives far better that adults. You will probably find they will adapt their responses to suit Grandad's speech or behavior automatically.

    Barraf
     

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