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Discussion in 'Recently diagnosed and early stages of dementia' started by RP, Jan 5, 2017.

  1. RP

    RP Registered User

    Jan 5, 2017
    My Mum was diagnosed mid-2015. 18 months on I am struggling to know when she is telling me something that happened or was imagined. Today she claimed that someone whom she used to work with -over 50 years ago and hundreds of miles away- turned up on her doorstep as he was just passing. I worry that she is too trusting of people turning up.
  2. AlsoConfused

    AlsoConfused Registered User

    Sep 17, 2010
    Some confabulations are clearly nonsense (Mum's stories about helping her Grandad train lions and tigers could never have been true, for example). The rest of them always slot into the "doubtful" category because even if the events actually happened they may not have happened at the specified time or have anything to do with the specified reasons.

    I think the key challenge is to find out ways for ensuring critical information can be checked / corroborated. If the PWD says they've a hospital appointment next week, for example, have the carers got good enough links with the GP / hospital to check whether this is so?

    Safeguarding someone who's vulnerable (because of PWD or for any other reason) is a continuing nightmare, isn't it?

    It helps if their financial safety is protected - eg by the phone being barred to scam callers, the debit / credit card and cheque-book being held by a trustworthy, intellectually able family member or friend. If scammers can't easily make money out of the vulnerable person they may well back off and target someone else not so well protected.
  3. Angie1996

    Angie1996 Registered User

    May 15, 2016
    Your right to worry, my dad had people turn up, but could never tell me who or why etc, I used to panic like mad, sometimes it was true, sometimes it was completely wrong, I used to talk to him loads to try and work out what had happened, most of the time I worked it out. This is a tough phase!! Some things were really not real too and it's hard trying to work out reality from hallucinations

    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
  4. Pott

    Pott Registered User

    Dec 3, 2016
    My dad tells some fantastic 'stories'. At the moment he is living in a television programme.

    What worries me is that I will not pick up on any ill treatment by carers in his nursing home. He complains about them but it is hard to get him to stay on topic or get to the point. Luckily he often says something that makes us realise it is in his imagination or a misinterpretation of things. For example he says the staff ignore one lady, half an hour visiting shows that is far from the case.

    Luckily my dad generally ignored the door bell due to deafness (despite hearing aids).
  5. Herewego

    Herewego Registered User

    Mar 9, 2017
    There can be funny moments!

    I have noticed that my husband has begun the decline into Alzheimer's since 2011 but we are only now going through the 'memory clinic' cycle of tests/scans etal, so I am hoping we will get a diagnosis sometime in the next few months.

    I do know he has it, just don't know which one yet although I think he has dementia with Lewy Bodies. A few years ago we were in Ireland visiting relations and as I am doing family tree research had been visiting graveyards - on two different nights my husband woke up and was convinced a ghost was sitting on the end of our bed and he was yelling at it to go away. Then not long ago he woke me up in the middle of the night to say that someone was in the house - my response - no one is in the house, go back to sleep - his response - someone is definitely in the house, so what are you going to do about it! Well, I reiterated that there was no one in the house and to go back to sleep - he did but I couldn't stop laughing - I thought it was decidedly funny............. There are times that if you don't laugh you might cry - I prefer to laugh....... Alongside these specific instances, he constantly thinks someone has been or is in the house, usually our kids/grandkids - or that they were here, when in fact they weren't. He also seems to have hyper sensitive hearing - specifically hearing things that aren't there - people arguing under our window in the middle of the night, people coming into the house during the day.........you get the picture.

    His mom had this too (although at the time mid/late 1990's) we did not know about the Lewy Bodies - in fact I didn't realize until I started researching in the last few years that there were different types and that you could have more than one at a time.

    Although I live with my husband I still worry about what he may inadvertently agree to and so we are just now going through moving the main contact for telephone/energy etal to me - as it is - I do all the transactions anyway as he has lost his ability to use technology well enough to do any forms etal on line - can't always remember how to use his mobile now. Sad, but it is what it is.......
  6. jen54

    jen54 Registered User

    May 20, 2014
    Mum cones out with some confabulations, she went through a phase of insisting we went to find out where all my dads inheritance was, as she knew his dad was rich..and worked at the big house on the hill..she could see it and him from the window,(trees bad grown that was why we couldn't see it now),no such house etc totally made up, as I knew the history, but she was insistent there was money owing us.
    Then she was going to see dads friend. And had gone to her house.... The story so detailed,but impossible.
    Last visit a large black and white dog was barking at her from the garden.
    I have to just agree, go along with it now,and change the subject
    At present I am assuming she is confusing dreams, as she dozes a lot, with real memories as she hasn't actually seen anything while I am there.
    I am reassured that mum is still astutely aware about strangers as the neighbour who arranged his builder to paint her house knocked to tell her he had finished,(I had told him the situation and that we would deal with it,and mum wouldn't recall anyone painting her house) mum evidently told him to clear off, that she hadn't asked him go paint house and that she was a poor pensioner who had no money to pay anyone, which he recounted to us with a chuckle, so that reassured me.
    You feel the pwd is very vulnerable and I do worry someone could take advantage. I think that always stops me telling people about mum..it feels as I I am letting people in on the fact she could be taken advantage of.
  7. blue skies

    blue skies Registered User

    Sep 18, 2015
    Hallucinations / Delusions are just endless

    Good Morning
    I do have to agree with you if you didn't laugh you would cry !!!! I love my Mum to bits but its now not laughing matter !!! . I like you believe my Mother has Dementia and like you it may well be with Lewy Bodies , the Hallucinations/Delusions started 4 years ago just occasionally to start with but now its every day, whether or not I'm at work or at home, there's no rhyme or reason to it apart from the hearing of voices say the same thing time and time again , its all directed at myself that I'm running a brothel and I'm a prostitute (I'm 58, overweight so not a pretty sight naked ) !!!! It took 9 months to get her near her surgery and in the memory test there was slight impairment but Mother walked out half way through, she wears 6 watches, conversation wise is the good old days , family etc etc. She isn't eating properly, but still drives locally but not far , her home is kept tidy and she is clean in herself, so what stage is she at, god knows !!! but I have fun and games, I handed her my house keys back to her flat 4 years ago when she started to blame me for things disappearing or stolen as she puts it, but funnily enough most of the time I find them, in very strange places !! I must have patience of a saint, and so must you we find strength and I have to say that this site is wonderful. Take each day as it comes.

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