1. Pear trees

    Pear trees Registered User

    Jan 25, 2015
    442
    I've just spent nearly 40 minutes trying to explain to my mum why we took £1700 out of her purse and put it safely in the bank-we left her with £300 which is still more than enough for shopping lunch clubs etc. I had put a note in her purse to help her remember and showed her the payin slip, but she keeps asking where the money is and will not believe me when I say it is safely in bank. I don't even know where all the money came from because I manage her bank account, she must have yet another stash of money hidden that I did not know about.
    Just when I think she understood she asked the same question again and we started all over again. Finally I promised to bring her more money next time and that seemed to satisfy her for now, but we'll go through the same thing tomorrow!
     
  2. patsy56

    patsy56 Registered User

    Jan 14, 2015
    840
    Fife Scotland
    good for you yes I try to keep mum with £300 in the house as long as she has enough for her hair, the gardeners, the cleaner I'm happy.

    But here in Scotland we have different banks and she absolutely HATES Clydesdale£10'ners.........she says they look like Euros or toy town she wants her own bank, Royal Bank of Scotland......heaven forbid what would happen if I give her an English one.
     
  3. cragmaid

    cragmaid Registered User

    Oct 18, 2010
    7,963
    North East England
    whoever said .....Tomorrow is another day...( yes I know, Scarlet O'Hara in Gone with the Wind)...lied;):rolleyes::rolleyes:

    With Dementia, Tomorrow is always just an extension of the same day!!!:D:D

    The answer, I found, to the question of "Have I enough money " was always..." Yes Mum".:cool:
     
  4. Pear trees

    Pear trees Registered User

    Jan 25, 2015
    442
    I'll try that Craigmaid, and try to divert her from asking about money in bank, thanks
     
  5. Linbrusco

    Linbrusco Registered User

    Mar 4, 2013
    1,538
    Female
    Auckland...... New Zealand
    #5 Linbrusco, Aug 23, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 23, 2015
    The money issue drives me batty.
    Mum always did the finances up until she was diagnosed with AD and unable to understand her bills in the mail and I found my brother had taken financial advantage of her, so I took over.
    I work for a bank and have always had authority on Mum & Dads bank accounts, so each week I take out the same amount of spending money for them both.
    Mum still has an ATM card for groceries only & Dad has never ever had an ATM or credit card.
    After Mum hiding money, and then losing it and then finding it I convinced her ( was not easy) to give it to me for safe keeping. She had about GBP100 in small notes.
    A few hours later that GBP100 was, 300 according to Mum.
    I had to show her the notes and tell her that I had worked for a bank for near 30 yrs and would I cheat her out of money?! She said No :)

    Now I give her half and keep the other half at home. If I know she hasn't spent her money, I put the extra in a seperate bank account for her. Then she complains I have given Dad money and not her, and its unfair :rolleyes:
    Unfortunately if Dad knows Mum has money he will ask her for it. He gambles given the chance. So I tell her I don't like her to have too much as Dad will ask her for it ( true)
    Dad has gone so far to take advantage of Mums memory by saying to her if she can pay him back the money he gave her.

    I caught him out, as that week Mum had had no money left in her purse at all to give him.:mad:
     
  6. Pear trees

    Pear trees Registered User

    Jan 25, 2015
    442
    It is hurtful when she accuses me of keeping the money for myself, when my brother 'borrowed' large sums from her before I got POA and stopped him, now he won't speak to me.
    It's her current obsession and she sits there when on her own counting the money repeatedly.
    Hopefully when she's back at her lunch club not missing her lunch will be her new obsession!
     
  7. AndreaP

    AndreaP Registered User

    Money is a big issue for my mother as well. She withdrew $800 from a bank one day when I was with her because there were bills to be paid. I took her straight to the car where she gave me $400 and I said "wait here while I pay these bills at the post office". I was back 10 minutes later and she was distraught saying $400 had disappeared. It took me 3 attempts that day to explain where half her money had gone.

    It distresses me to see her going through her handbag which she does obsessively. It has 3 zippered compartments and she opens and closes them continuously reassuring herself her money and her house key is safe.
     
  8. patsy56

    patsy56 Registered User

    Jan 14, 2015
    840
    Fife Scotland
    My mum does this all the time and to be honest I am beginning to do the same as I think it's catching.............not my bag hers. I'm frightened she moves the money or the keys.
     

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