I've only recently discovered this forum but already have found it helpful. Because my family find it so hard to speak about my mother's illness it's a comfort to know I can log on here and express my feeling's. Also reading what is happening to other people. My father leaves the room whenever I try to speak about my mother, my mother is sixty- five, and was diagnosed in her late fifty's. She deteriorated quite quickly initially and very soon could not function without 24 hr care. My mum has been in hospital for roughly 4/5 yr's now and our family has pretty much fallen apart in this time. My sister and younger brother do not visit at all, my other brother visit's to collect my mum's washing, he has ME and has good day's and bad day's. The hospital my mum is in is about 15 miles from where I live ,I'm a nurse and I work full-time, MY husband came to visit once and became so upset he hasn't been since. So I visit on my own, some day's are better than other's she sleep's a lot of the time I'm there but I stay and wait for her to wake. I will alway's feel guilty for admitting my mother to the place she is now, at the time there was no chice my father wasn't coping and there didn;t seem to be much support from any where else. My father is wishing now for an end ,thing's will never be the same in our family, I just hope and pray that whatever 's going on inside my mum's head that she is not aware, and that hopefully the thought's she has are only happy one's. I know this is a question you all most probably have asked you self , why my mum, dad , my mother was the most loveliest person ever and she was so content with what she had , never complained, and this happened. I try to take each visit as they come but sometimes I just want to weep for the mum that's lost.