I NEED your help and advise!
Bit of setup story (please stay with me)
I currently live with my wife, 1 year old and 90+ years old grandmother-in-law that's has late stage vascular dementia.
We moved in around 2 years ago to help out, give my wife chance to spending quality time with her grandmother and us a chance to save for a mortgage deposit.
My wife and I both work. (My self full-time and my wife part time having just finished maternity leave). We supply all the care during the evenings/days off/weekends. With the mother-in-law supplying brief pop ins during he days my wife is at work to make sure the grandmother is fine/fed.
The Problem
In a few months professional help is going to be needed due to us having our own place and needing to put more quality time into the growth and development of our 1 year old. BUT the mother-in-law won't allow it to happen!
She won't allow any money to be spent on care due to it being clear her agenda is to received a house (£200+) and an untouched bank balance (well parts she does spend. I'll get to this later) that is all willed to herself.
Over the 2 years she has used emotional black mail and my wife's sheer terror of possibly upsetting her and causing drama. Also placing road blocks and stifling any plans. From losing power of attorney forms... to not allowing my wife to fill in attendance allowance forms with reasons likes, 'It's my mum I should fill in the forms'.....which never happened.
Something needs to be done!
I've thought about reporting her/the situation. Just not sure if I'm able to do so anonymously. As I don't want to cause a family feud for my wife, which is the thing she's feared all along.
If anything was ever investigated it would come to light that the mother-in-law has and uses her mother's (the grandmother-in-law) bank card/balance to fund her own life. From buying shopping and fuel. All the way up to buying cars. Which I personally believe is disgusting regardless if it will one day be her money or not.
The mother-in-law is just counting down the days until the passing of her OWN mother. While doing as little as possible in making her time left as comfortable as possible. She's not even willing to move into her 'family home' (we've had this thrown in our faces many time in attempt to remind her the house is hers) to help care, in fear of losing her council house that she wishes to buy with the willed money. In effort to live of the funds and not have to work any more.
Soooo please help with your advise as action is needed soon!
Thanks for reading.
Mr Hadenough
Bit of setup story (please stay with me)
I currently live with my wife, 1 year old and 90+ years old grandmother-in-law that's has late stage vascular dementia.
We moved in around 2 years ago to help out, give my wife chance to spending quality time with her grandmother and us a chance to save for a mortgage deposit.
My wife and I both work. (My self full-time and my wife part time having just finished maternity leave). We supply all the care during the evenings/days off/weekends. With the mother-in-law supplying brief pop ins during he days my wife is at work to make sure the grandmother is fine/fed.
The Problem
In a few months professional help is going to be needed due to us having our own place and needing to put more quality time into the growth and development of our 1 year old. BUT the mother-in-law won't allow it to happen!
She won't allow any money to be spent on care due to it being clear her agenda is to received a house (£200+) and an untouched bank balance (well parts she does spend. I'll get to this later) that is all willed to herself.
Over the 2 years she has used emotional black mail and my wife's sheer terror of possibly upsetting her and causing drama. Also placing road blocks and stifling any plans. From losing power of attorney forms... to not allowing my wife to fill in attendance allowance forms with reasons likes, 'It's my mum I should fill in the forms'.....which never happened.
Something needs to be done!
I've thought about reporting her/the situation. Just not sure if I'm able to do so anonymously. As I don't want to cause a family feud for my wife, which is the thing she's feared all along.
If anything was ever investigated it would come to light that the mother-in-law has and uses her mother's (the grandmother-in-law) bank card/balance to fund her own life. From buying shopping and fuel. All the way up to buying cars. Which I personally believe is disgusting regardless if it will one day be her money or not.
The mother-in-law is just counting down the days until the passing of her OWN mother. While doing as little as possible in making her time left as comfortable as possible. She's not even willing to move into her 'family home' (we've had this thrown in our faces many time in attempt to remind her the house is hers) to help care, in fear of losing her council house that she wishes to buy with the willed money. In effort to live of the funds and not have to work any more.
Soooo please help with your advise as action is needed soon!
Thanks for reading.
Mr Hadenough