Oh dear. It's me again with the Mother who seems off her trolley. A quick recap. Since Xmas Mum has been getting increasingly mad. She now spends most of her time talking to imaginary people, either alive or dead. Sometimes it's my late father, or a boyfriend from when she was 18, or my brother (who is still alive) although he is not in the house. My brother has had bizarre conversations on the phone with Mum when she is talking to real him on the phone and imaginary him in the room. She has carers who come in twice a day for about 20 mins. One of these she adores and has decided that she has adopted the carer as a daughter. Mum has taken vehemently against me, but also is very anti women on the TV. She has locked a carer out of the house, and been abusive to carers, even to the one she adores. Yesterday I got a call from the Carer team leader to say that the carer arrived to find Mum on her knees in front of her powered wheelchair. Mum was abusive and told the carer to get out of the house. Mum's story was that she had called the doctor who lives across the road and he was coming to help. I said that this was most likely a fantasy, and that the carer should go back in and try to convince her that the doctor had told the carer to get Mum back in the chair. This was attempted but more abuse. So the carer retreated to the kitchen and waited. Mum calmed down and eventually accepted help to get back in her chair.
So another day of a crisis! I'm at a loss as to what to do. The GP has agreed that Mum has some sort of dementia or alcohol related brain damage or a combo of both. But no assessment have been carried out. Mainly because Mum will insist that there is nothing wrong with her.
Social work have been out recently and did a reassessment and we are just waiting for confirmation that the number of visits can be increased to 3 a day. But the care company is already struggling with staffing so I'm not confident that three visits will happen. We are in Scotland so the current visits are funded by the council.
We would happily pay for a carer to come and spend more time with Mum but as she lives rurally in Galloway the number of carers are few and far between. I am also concerned about whether anyone would want to do the job when I tell them that she can be aggressive and abusive.
We are trying to keep her in her own home but increasingly it looks tricky.
I'm worried that my brother and I are going to end up having to spend week about staying with her, which is going to be really hard as she smokes and neither of us can stand the smoky atmosphere, and combined with the mad behaviour it's a tricky combination.
There is a nearby care home but my brother thinks that moving her there would be really traumatic. She still is aware of where she is and manages her little routines. It's just that she cannot cope if something goes wrong, and she's constantly having these fantasy conversations. I really don't know what to do. Should I press the GP for a proper diagnosis?
I live 150+ miles away and my brother lives 300+ miles away! It's a nightmare.
So another day of a crisis! I'm at a loss as to what to do. The GP has agreed that Mum has some sort of dementia or alcohol related brain damage or a combo of both. But no assessment have been carried out. Mainly because Mum will insist that there is nothing wrong with her.
Social work have been out recently and did a reassessment and we are just waiting for confirmation that the number of visits can be increased to 3 a day. But the care company is already struggling with staffing so I'm not confident that three visits will happen. We are in Scotland so the current visits are funded by the council.
We would happily pay for a carer to come and spend more time with Mum but as she lives rurally in Galloway the number of carers are few and far between. I am also concerned about whether anyone would want to do the job when I tell them that she can be aggressive and abusive.
We are trying to keep her in her own home but increasingly it looks tricky.
I'm worried that my brother and I are going to end up having to spend week about staying with her, which is going to be really hard as she smokes and neither of us can stand the smoky atmosphere, and combined with the mad behaviour it's a tricky combination.
There is a nearby care home but my brother thinks that moving her there would be really traumatic. She still is aware of where she is and manages her little routines. It's just that she cannot cope if something goes wrong, and she's constantly having these fantasy conversations. I really don't know what to do. Should I press the GP for a proper diagnosis?
I live 150+ miles away and my brother lives 300+ miles away! It's a nightmare.
