1. hawaii50

    hawaii50 Registered User

    That's great news Alfjess. I hope you get everything sorted soon. At least they are safely together in a wonderful environment for the time being.
    My brother has relented!!! Update you soon.
    Elspeth
     
  2. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Jennifer

    You are really to polite. I call my brother a few things, but they are unprintable:D

    Hi Elspeth

    Glad to hear your brother has relented, will we now be co-visiters?

    Hi All

    Thanks for all your support through these last few difficult days. I phoned the care home last night and Mum and Dad had settled well.

    Alfjess
     
  3. jenniferpa

    jenniferpa Volunteer Moderator

    Jun 27, 2006
    39,424
    Hi there. Glad to hear they've settled. How about you, are you getting enough rest?

    Jennifer
     
  4. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    So far so good - really pleased your Mum and Dad are together and fairly settled. At least their contentment in their present situation may make it more difficult for your brother to make objections.
    Thinking about you and hope the meeting goes well for you on Wednesday (tomorrow).
    Best wishes Beckyjan
     
  5. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,909
    Kent
    Hi Alfjess,

    Whatever the worries are for you in the future, even with your brother, you have overcome the biggest hurdle. Your parents are still together, being well looked after, and you will have time to recover and, hopefully, relax a little.

    Take care. it seems to be working out for the best.

    Love
     
  6. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Hi Alfjess

    How are things going? I thought of you when I heard of the fire in the NH at Hamilton. I hope that's not the one where your parents are? That would be the last straw for you.

    Love,
     
  7. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Hazel

    No fortunately, my parents are in Lesmahagow and it is a lovely place, not just a care home but a whole retirement village, from apartments, bungalows, through to EMI unit.
    The complex has man made lakes with a barge, fountains and swans. Walled garden, courtyard cafe, beautiful grounds and walks.

    Although I haven't visited yet, I am giving them time to settle, I have phoned and been told that they are fine, but Mum is asking how she can get home. It is early days I suppose

    I had a meeting SS to-day. They said that all the professionals involved, are in agreement that Mum and Dad need 24 hour care and if my brother objects and says he will provide their care (which he has) he will have to prove that he can give the same level of care they are now receiving, ie. same as the care home, which is impossible.

    Next week there is a review meeting planned and my bother is invited, providing the care home agrees to him being there, because of the last episode.
    Whatever happens I have been assured that Mum and Dad will not be moved or upset and that is the most important issue. Anything else I can deal with

    Thanks for your concern. I hope both you and John are doing OK and you are looking after yourself as well as you can.

    Alfjess
     
  8. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Hazel

    I hadn't heard about the fire in Hamilton, Iwill have to listen to the news.

    Was any one injured?

    Alfjess
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,909
    Kent
    Alfjess, the NH sounds wonderful. I do hope your parents will settle and be happy and comfortable there. It will be so good for you, not to need to worry so much about them.

    With love
     
  10. Nell

    Nell Registered User

    Aug 9, 2005
    1,170
    Australia
    Dear Alfjess,
    So pleased your M&D are settled and that your brother will be "dealt with" efficiently by the "powers that be"!!

    Please, please try to take some time for yourself over the next few days. I expect you'll find that hard to do as you've had so little "me time" for so long - but I think it is essential for your continued well being. (Will now take off my preacher's hat to send you some hugs!! ;) )

    {{{{HUGS}}}}
     
  11. jan.

    jan. Registered User

    Apr 19, 2006
    405
    Cheshire, UK.
    Dear Alfjess,

    What an idealistic setting for your parents to be in..........you must feel really happy that they seem to be settling in well. I`m so happy for you that they can still be together......what a relief for you.

    I hope you are able to relax a little now, knowing that they are in good hands and being well cared for.

    Thinking of you.

    Love Jan. :)
     
  12. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Hi Alfjess

    Glad to hear your parents aren't in Hamilton. It sounds quite nasty. Lots of patients taken to hospital with smoke inhalation, which can't be good considering their position. Haven't heard of any casualties yet, but.......

    Your parents' place sounds idyllic. I wish it was nearer to us! We haven't anything like that here. I hope the meeting with your brother isn't too stressful, I don't think there's anything he can do, so long as your mum and dad are being well looked after.

    John and I are OK at the moment, although I'm having problems with my neck and trapped nerve again. It gets to the stage that I can't see to read the screen for too long. Very frustrating! Still, it's a minor problem compared with others.

    Love,
     
  13. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi All

    No thumping heart for 2 days now, so maybe it was anxiety.

    Brother visited Mum and Dad to-day and especially Mum got very upset, wanting to go home. The manager of the care home phoned SS to ask if they could ask my brother to leave, so that they could settle Mum and Dad.

    Meanwhile my brother phoned me, saying that, as they were in the care home permanently could he have their television as his was broken!!::confused: I agreed. I have more to worry about than a television.

    One positive, is that by taking the television, he must be agreeing to permanent care. Hooray:D

    I have phoned the care home and Mum and Dad are settled again.

    Thanks all
    Alfjess
     
  14. jan.

    jan. Registered User

    Apr 19, 2006
    405
    Cheshire, UK.
    Dear Alfjess,

    Sounds like your brother maybe relenting at last..........what good news :D so good to see that things may be sorting themselves out in a positive way :) . Thanks for letting us know how you`re getting on. Keep posting.

    Love Jan. X :)
     
  15. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi All

    I had an unbroken sleep last night, first time in I don't know how long, infact, I didn't wake until 10.45 am. Unheard of for me.

    I managed to clean downstairs, with no interuptions, but it did feel strange. I was thinking, it will be good if I can get this or that done before I had to see to Mum and Dad, then remembering they are not here. Habit, I suppose.

    I had a letter from the hospital to-day, an appointment for Dad to go have a 24 hour heart monitor fitted then go back the next day to get the readings? I feel it would be a wasted excerise and cause undue stress to both Dad and Mum.

    When in hospital he removed all monitors. The care home has been taking his pulse and blood pressure regularly and since stopping aricept and quinine medication, it has been normal. I have to phone the consultant's secretary on Monday to discuss if it necessary.

    Will keep you all posted as to the outcome of the review next Thursday, re permanent care

    Thanks everyone for the tremendous support

    Look afater yourselves

    Alfjess
     
  16. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    at the time they thought Jan's heart might be responsible for her faints/fits, they once fitted her with an ambulatory heart monitor.

    Just after fitting it, before we left the hospital, she collapsed and I was told later that hthey thought her heart had stopped as they went into full emergency mode.

    Great, I thought, when I learned she was actually ok [they had simply experienced what i had experienced many times at home], the monitor will have recorded everything.

    No such luck, it simply recorded ... nothing. They couldn't figure it out.

    We never tried again.
     
  17. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Alfjess, that sounds like heaven!:) :) :) Hope last night was as good!

    You seem to have found the best possible solution, let's hope the meeting on Thursday goes well.

    Love,
     
  18. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi

    I visited Mum and Dad for the first time since the very hurried admittance to the care home last Monday (both my daughters had visited over the weekend)

    I dreaded visiting, because reports had said Mum wanted to go home and only very late, when exhausted would she go to her room, which means Dad was also not getting to bed.

    However, it was much better than expected. Mum appeared to be in her element, talking to this one and that one and of course everyone knew her, because everywhere she goes she meets someone who knows her (so famous!!)
    She thinks her Mum and Dad owns the whole place, but she also thought that when they were in the chalet in my garden, her Mum and Dad owned the whole village!! I wish, we would be worth millions by now.
    Anyway, Mum insisted I took home with me a brass standard lamp with spotlights, from the lounge, as she had ordered some more and they were arriving next week. I carried the lamp to reception to keep her happy and they laughed when I explained why, told me to just leave it and they would return it

    Although Mum is as "normal" I'm not so sure about Dad, he was very quiet, but that isn't unusual, he has always been quiet, but there was just something I wasn't quite happy about. He was disorientated and a bit confused.

    It is 10 days since Aricept was stopped. Would I notice a deterioration this soon?

    Thanks Alfjess
     
  19. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Hi Alfjess

    I'm glad your visit wasn't as bad as you expected. I didn't realise you were a millionaire, I'd have been much more polite to you!:D

    Your mum sounds a wonderful character -- but it's a good job she's got lots of people to care for her now.

    I hope your dad settles down. I don't know how long it takes for the medication to get out of the system, but I imagine he'd be feeling the effects by now. Will they put him back on it if he deteriorates? Our consultant said he'd do that when the time comes to try John without.

    Love,
     
  20. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,909
    Kent
    Hi Alfjess, the first hurdle over, the first visit, and the fact it was better than you expected can only be good.

    Sorry your dad seems subdued. It might be the withdrawal of Aricept, I`ve no experience of that so can`t make any judgement, or it could be confusion and disorientation. Time will tell, but it is a worry.

    Your mother`s idea is the best. it seems to her it`s home from home.

    It reminded me of my neighbour, when he went into his NH. He told me he`d `bought the place` and was very proud of the beautiful gardens which were far superior to those in his `old home`.

    Take care xx
     

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