I don’t know how to begin a new thread so I am adding to this one, hope this is ok.
I would like some pointers please about a new behaviour that my Dad is displaying. My Mum is his primary carer, as you know, and things are getting to the stage where he does not like to be left and kicks off before she is meant to go out sometimes. This does not happen each time she goes out, in fact it tends to happen mostly just before she is due to pick up my MIL on the pretence that she is accompanying her to a physio appointment (but actually meeting for tea and sympathy). This doesn’t mean to suggest that he doesn’t like my MIL, in fact he really does and has a lot of respect for her, but he always causes an issue for Mum just before she goes out; and when Mum returns 2 hours or so later she usually finds angry notes around the house and/or him gone out, or him waiting for her to return so he can shout and her and then leave. He usually then comes over to mine (even if I am at work still, he will wait outside for me) to explain how mad she is and how he’s had enough. It’s all so hard.
I've heard of shadowing, which he will do when Mum is moving from room to room, but because he’s able to function “normally” in so many other ways (he will happily sit and read for hours, research local history on the computer, even paint the garden fence) I am unable to explain or correlate this pattern of behaviour. Is this also fear of abandonment? Some insight would be appreciated. Thank you.
I would like some pointers please about a new behaviour that my Dad is displaying. My Mum is his primary carer, as you know, and things are getting to the stage where he does not like to be left and kicks off before she is meant to go out sometimes. This does not happen each time she goes out, in fact it tends to happen mostly just before she is due to pick up my MIL on the pretence that she is accompanying her to a physio appointment (but actually meeting for tea and sympathy). This doesn’t mean to suggest that he doesn’t like my MIL, in fact he really does and has a lot of respect for her, but he always causes an issue for Mum just before she goes out; and when Mum returns 2 hours or so later she usually finds angry notes around the house and/or him gone out, or him waiting for her to return so he can shout and her and then leave. He usually then comes over to mine (even if I am at work still, he will wait outside for me) to explain how mad she is and how he’s had enough. It’s all so hard.
I've heard of shadowing, which he will do when Mum is moving from room to room, but because he’s able to function “normally” in so many other ways (he will happily sit and read for hours, research local history on the computer, even paint the garden fence) I am unable to explain or correlate this pattern of behaviour. Is this also fear of abandonment? Some insight would be appreciated. Thank you.