A warm welcome to Dementia Talking Point
@oxtedbird.
My mother, who also has vascular dementia, flatly refused to believe there was anything wrong with her. All the problems she was having were either due to her neighbours or to me. Also because her memory wasn't affected at first it took me a while to realise there really was something very awry and it wasn't just my mother's personality becoming more extreme as she aged. In the end I didn't really discuss it with her, just sorted out what needed to be done to keep her safe.
If you can get your dad to agree to setting up
Power of Attorney. Perhaps give your dad a week or so to come to terms with the diagnosis, before you raise the subject so it doesn't sound like there is a direct correlation between getting that sorted and his diagnosis. I was lucky in that a friend of mum, who obvious saw mum was starting to have problems, recommended that she sorted out Power of Attorney. I think if I'd suggested it I might not have got anywhere. Does your dad have any friends that could suggest it? We went through a solicitor as that made mum happier about it all, but you can do it yourself which is much cheaper.
You might find these fact sheets useful for finding what support is out there
Use our dementia directory to find local support services for people with dementia and their carers in England, Wales and Northern Ireland.
www.alzheimers.org.uk
Finally vascular dementia tends to go in steps. So you may find your dad stays much as he is for a good while, before having a bit of a downturn, so try and get as many things sorted now while you can.
I'm sure others will be along shortly with their tips and suggestions, but in the meantime do have a look round this very friendly and supportive site.