CPN first visit

[Lilibet1]

Last night things came to a head and i reached rock bottom(not for the first time but definatley the worst) and my daughter came and stayed the night.
Well today we have been to the CPN for the first time. Brian has deteriorated a lot this last week and we visited the CPN for an assessment not sure how i really feel about it. The outcome was that he should go to emergency respite. Now waiting for social services to contact us.
I now feel so quilty about this. What do i tell him and how do i explain it to him. Will he be ok when he comes back from there. Not sure if i should let him go.
How have others found this situation??
Sorry so many questions.

 

[marionq]

This will be a learning curve for you in several ways. Will he do better in respite than at home once he has adjusted? Will you be able to care for him better when not so stressed and exhausted? Will he find the company of others stimulating?

You might have to let go and tell him this is a short holiday for both of you. The advice on TP seems to be not to overdo the visiting at first until the patient adapts to new surroundings.

Good luck.

 

[Lilibet1]

This will be a learning curve for you in several ways. Will he do better in respite than at home once he has adjusted? Will you be able to care for him better when not so stressed and exhausted? Will he find the company of others stimulating?

You might have to let go and tell him this is a short holiday for both of you. The advice on TP seems to be not to overdo the visiting at first until the patient adapts to new surroundings.

Good luck.

Thank you for your response. I haven't heard from SS yet so presume we won't today. I shall just have to wait and see what happens but i am dreading the weekend.

 

[Lilibet1]

Update

After the most terrible few weeks and a visit to the CPN on 12th March (seems forever ago) Brian was admitted to hospital. That was traumatic enough has he had been completley manic all day not stopping to eat or drink and after finally taking 2 temazepam (on doctors say so) he started to fall asleep standing up in the kitchen. We had to call for help as my daughter and myself couldn't get him to move and couldn't hold him up. The paramedics came to get him into bed well that was when the "fun" started he turned on the paramedic and was REALLY aggressive to him. We eventually had to get a doctor to come out and give him a sedative ( he was wide awake by now despite the tablets earlier) anyway the doctor was not going to be allowed in as Brian went mad at him. To cut a very long story short the doctor sitting in his car outside arranged for an ambulance and police to take him to A&E. He was ok to start with then when the lifted his legs to put him onto the trolley he was like a wild thi, screaming and shouting and of course he's really strong. they finally got him into the ambulance and off to hospital as this was about 4.30am i was told to get some rest and phone in the morning. After all this it turned out that Brian had a chest infection and pneumonia. He never showed any signs of either of these although he did say that his ribs hurt but then he also keeps saying his legs hurt, I feel so bad i am in bits. It now looks like he will be going into a CH permantely as he's now not as good as he was even though the infection has cleared up.

I feel so guilty about it all and looking at care homes was dreadful as he's only 63. Hopefully i've found one that is local and can take him, still not looking forward to telling him. Feel so sad that he's not coming home.

Thanks for listening.

 

[Grannie G]

You can`t do anything other than what you`re doing now, Lilibet. It is a tragedy but no one`s fault.

If your husband will accept he is going into hospital because he can`t continue the way he is it will help. But if he can`t accept this put the blame and responsibility on the doctors. It may help him feel less antagonistic towards you.

I do feel for you. You are living through a nightmare.

 

[truth24]

So sorry to hear if your troubles. Hope he settles down and you can stop feeling guilty.

Sent from my GT-N5110 using Talking Point mobile app

 

[bilslin]

Hi lilibet I know its easy said than done don't feel guilty you've done the best you can and it must be hard for you that brains got to go into a CH but I don't see that you have any choice than to let him go in. he'll be safe and looked after and you ll be safe too. My heart goes out to you because I will dread telling my mum when the time comes. So take care lindaxx