My brother was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimers about 6 years ago. He's now 68. My husband and I try to support my SiL and her sons as they cope with the varying stages this disease is taking on my brother's health. It's agonising watching the effect this is having on their family and we try to call in once or twice a week - as much to be a sounding-board for my SiL to rant at as anything else!
The main issue now is that my brother will not co-operate in any way, most of the time. Getting him washed and dressed is a major problem as he will physically resist any attempt to get him to change his clothes and will not get out of bed, even though he's wet it. He will often remove his incontinence pads and leave them lying around - ANYWHERE! If we call round when he's like this he will either be quietly civil but not agree to anything we say or else he will just walk out of the room.
It's the same with trying to get him to take his medication!
Occasionally he will respond to someone else whilst ignoring his wife - he really seems to be nasty towards her at times. He doesn't know who any of us are but he particularly gets annoyed about 'that woman'! My SiL is breaking her heart over all this, even though she knows it's the illness that is causing it. After a day of cajoling, encouraging, pleading bullying to get anything done she is exhausted, physically and mentally. She herself has health issues so the time is coming when she will not be able to cope. She's contacted social services to see what help she can get but hell will likely freeze over before they respond, if previous requests are anything to go by.
She was going to the hospital to have a blood test herself this morning, I'd said I'd come and sit in with him, but she texted me and said he was just being so foul that one of her sons had ducked out of work to deal with him while she went.
Any ideas about dealing with this 'resistance'? So far he has not got physically abusive but one of these days I can imagine him pushing her downstairs just to get her out of his way. It breaks my heart to see this man, my 'big bruvva', who was so loving and gentle, turn into this nasty aggressive person.
Librarymaid
The main issue now is that my brother will not co-operate in any way, most of the time. Getting him washed and dressed is a major problem as he will physically resist any attempt to get him to change his clothes and will not get out of bed, even though he's wet it. He will often remove his incontinence pads and leave them lying around - ANYWHERE! If we call round when he's like this he will either be quietly civil but not agree to anything we say or else he will just walk out of the room.
It's the same with trying to get him to take his medication!
Occasionally he will respond to someone else whilst ignoring his wife - he really seems to be nasty towards her at times. He doesn't know who any of us are but he particularly gets annoyed about 'that woman'! My SiL is breaking her heart over all this, even though she knows it's the illness that is causing it. After a day of cajoling, encouraging, pleading bullying to get anything done she is exhausted, physically and mentally. She herself has health issues so the time is coming when she will not be able to cope. She's contacted social services to see what help she can get but hell will likely freeze over before they respond, if previous requests are anything to go by.
She was going to the hospital to have a blood test herself this morning, I'd said I'd come and sit in with him, but she texted me and said he was just being so foul that one of her sons had ducked out of work to deal with him while she went.
Any ideas about dealing with this 'resistance'? So far he has not got physically abusive but one of these days I can imagine him pushing her downstairs just to get her out of his way. It breaks my heart to see this man, my 'big bruvva', who was so loving and gentle, turn into this nasty aggressive person.
Librarymaid
