Care Home Vs Staying At Home


Registered User
Nov 28, 2018
I don't think there is a straight answer. Every care home is different and every person with dementia is different. We booked mum into a nursing home for a fortnight's respite care and she came out thinking she lived in her childhood home and unable to eat without assistance. They were spoon-feeding her by the end.

When I went to check the place out it really did look like the answer to all our prayers! When the member of staff came round to do a pre-entry assessment, mum and I both told her about mum's mental state and her poor eyesight and yet each day when I came to visit, there were things awry - some fairly trivial but some more serious. The worst was going up to her room with the carers and seeing her pee out brown, stinky liquid and staring into space and barely able to communicate. Until I pointed it out, there was no mention of UTI, or acknowledgement that she was going downhill fast under their care.

Eventually, enough was enough and I had a discussion with the manager after I requested to see her file and asked why on her assessment, she'd been recorded as no visual impairment and no decline on cognitive function. That was after one young carer collared me on my way out and said, "I'd no idea your mum was nearly blind" (errr - white stick?!)

In spite of all that, there were some really happy residents, who seemed well cared for and cheerful.