cant remember shes eaten

[larivy]

we have not long been back from my brothers we had a lovely roast and trifle that mum really enjoyed i have just put her to bed (which she asked for) she was only in there 5minutes when she said are you going to do some dinner i told her we have already eaten but she want believe me she said i might have but she never phoned brother and asked him to tell her shes eaten and she said the same to him shes now up and wants her dinner i have offered her tea and biscuits or toast but no she wants a dinner this is about the 3rd time this week she has done this i end up cooking for her only for her to say shes not hungry if i dont do her something she keeps on if i do she dont want it has any one else had this larivy

 

[creativesarah]

how frustrating for you larivy dont know what to say really but know i am thinking of you Essex girls and their appetites EH!

 

[elaine n]

Oh Larivy, we're not at that stage yet but I do feel for you, it must be awful. Would it help to keep some cheap microwave meals in the freezer that you could heat up that wouldn't take you time to prepare or cost a fortune if mum didn't eat them? xxxe

 

[sistermillicent]

Yes, Larivy, my mum is very funny about food and meals. Dad always has a microwave meal ready to get out of the freezer, and it's the same with cups of tea, she wants them then doesn't, or doesn't then does, it is very unpredictable. I tend to plonk things down and see if she is interested, I don't ask much now.

I would say the best thing is to have something quick and/or inexpensive to just heat up, because having to actually cook is going to take a toll on you and tempers will get frayed (well mine would)when it is then rejected.

Mum's memory is so shot now that she will forget things very easily and mostly these ideas of eating will leave her head with a bit of distraction.

Love Pippa x

 

[Grannie G]

Dhiren use to forget he`d eaten larivy and ask what was for dinner 20 minutes after he`d eaten. But at least with him, most times if I asked if he was hungry, he`d say no.

He says he gets no food at the home and it`s why he is always starving when I get there.

If the cook asks if he has enjoyed his meal he always says `yes thank you` to her but when she goes asks me what she was talking about.

Elaine`s idea is the best. have some microwave meals in just in case.

 

[larivy]

thanks all i think i will be visiting i***and tomorrow
the trouble is i broke my tooth yesterday going mad with toothache now cant get into dentist till Tuesday found brandy helps though

 

[DeborahBlythe]

Although it must be really frustrating, Larivy, I can't help thinking it's quite a good sign that your mum is interested in food, even if it IS at the wrong time!
It reminds me of my mum asking the same sort of question 'What's happening now, mum?' ( To me ). 'Where are we going now?'

Just seems to be your mum is full of beans and that strikes me as good! ( Sorry, I know it's hard for you.) x

 

[elaine n]

Oooo! Not nice1 Is there no emergency dentist you can see?

 

[Grannie G]

Larivy, our local hospital has an emergency dental clinic during the evening. Mind you it`s ptobably only Mon-Fri and no Bank Holidays.
I hope you haven`t exposed a nerve.

 

[larivy]

ive just gave mum some soup she had about 2 mouthfuls and said thats enough now going to see if she will sleep now feed and watered
brandy seems to be helping my dentist is shut over weekend and his so gentle im a bit of a coward so unless i get desperate i will stick to brandy will get some oil of cloves as well tomorrow

 

[DeborahBlythe]

Aww, good luck with that tooth, Larivy. Why do these things always happen at Bank Holidays?

 

[comane]

no short memory

Havn't reached that state yet but my wife always forgets she has had a meal. Up to now she has not realised that she is ill but suddenly if I discuss some event which took place this morning or yesterday she will say "was I there?" and when I say "yes" she will become very distressed at her loss of memory. Yesterday she looked me straight in the face and asked "Is there something wrong with me?" I said "of course not" and tried to change the subject.

It is not like a cancer patient who can learn to accept their situation and should be told, but because Alzheimer's patients have no memory in an hours time they will forget and therefore there is no point in giving them a period of extreme distress by telling them they are ill and that they will only get worse.

 

[sunray]

Mum was the same

I had this with Mum, so kept leftovers that I could reheat, did some extra noodles and vegetables or a slice of "roast" which I would offer as a sandwich. I found that some soup in a small bowl was the ideal size if she had only recently eaten.

She also got up in the middle of the night and demanded her breakfast, so she ate a lot of toast and marmalade at 3am and then didn't really have an appetite at "real" breakfast time.

You do get used to all the changes eventually but spend some time pulling your hair out first.

Now she is silent and bedridden it would be wonderful to hear her say: "Where's my breakfast?"

Sue.

 

[scarletpauline]

I think you did the right thing offering her soup, Larivy, Jack likes those "Big soups" and they are not too expensive.
Sorry about the tooth, hope it doesn't get worse, oil of cloves is the best thing if you can't have the brandy
Love Pauline xx

 

[Helen33]

Morning Larivy,

I was thinking about you getting a couple of those frozen dinners in for just in case your mum won't settle and then you won't have to start cooking from scratch. I think one of the frozen food stores "Ic--and" have cheap sunday roast meals and seeing as mum doesn't eat them, you could go for the very cheapest.

Now as for that toothm Are you sure you can wait until Tuesday? Our emergency walk in centre do emergency treatments. I'll be wishing you a pain free day.

Love

 

[maryw]

Hi Larivy, my Mum used to eat lunch and then 10 minutes later ask "Am I having a late lunch today?". We would go with it and then try to distract her and then it wasn't mentioned again! Hope you get your tooth sorted - poor you!

 

[Grannie G]

Good morning larivy

I hope you managed some sleep last night and are not in agony today. oil of cloves is wonderful and whole cloves help too. Just leave them between the gum and the lip and let them do their work.

 

[Grannie G]

asked "Is there something wrong with me?" I said "of course not" and tried to change the subject.

I used to tell my husband he just has a poor memory. Do you think your wife would accept that?

 

[larivy]

thanks all been and got 6 frozen meals for mum as a backup she finally went back to bed ate a good breakfast and enjoyed the trip to shops my brother is coming to take us out later and we are going to nephews for bq so hopefully the little ones will wear her out
my tooth is livable as long as i eat on the other side
brandy and co codamol worked last night so have made sure ive got enough till last to Tuesday
hope you all have a great weekend love larivy

 

[Splat88]

I've taken to leaving MIL's plate onher tray, becuase if I feed her first ( very traditional appetite, strictly meat and two veg) and take it away, she forgets she's eaten and wants more, in spite of having left half her dinner most times. You do have to wonder what happens to appetite, it is very up and down.