Sorry to hear you had such a battle and with so little support from the dementia team. This is where this forum is such s help. People on here are experiencing or have experienced our problems and can often offer excellent advice or suggestions. I hope your wife is happy in her home and that you are now able to relax a little.
Avoidance/refusal of personal hygiene
- Thread starter Emilypen
- Start date
Anthoula, you have obviously not experienced this stage yet, it is very difficult but as lots of people have said, you cannot use any force and in many cases, this is the last bit of independence they have by saying NO. As carers, it upsets us more.
My husband is just getting to that stage. He washes and shaves daily, but shower, very difficult as he insists that he’s already had one. changing clothes is a big problem too. He now insists on wearing a thermal vest daily in this heat ?, which changes regularly, but nothing else very often. I have to sneak them away from him. Life is getting so much harder now and I feel that I won’t cope later on.
My mum was so particular and loved clothes BD (Before Dementia), she refuses a shower in the care home so they now give her a sponge/strip wash - it seems to work....for now... plus she hates her hair being washed which really bothers me but not her
it is very hard, must be much harder for you as its your husband XWhen you are dealing with your loved one who thinks that they have had a wash. But they haven’t. It’s not disgusting, it’s an awful experience to have to deal with. It’s extremely common for people with Alzheimer’s or dementia. My experience, with the advice I have had from the Alzheimer’s nurse, is to be there. Not to argue or criticise.
My mum gets really upset and anxious about washing. Completely not her fault. I calm her down. Sometimes I get in the shower with her. Never make an issue about it.
It’s hard work.
There are no rules with Alzheimer’s or dementia. Sadly
Vanessa
Help with showering strategy for mum please.
She’s 80 and quite fit, cleaner (recently accepted as house was grubby) but no carer, Dad (80) and I are sure she’s had no shower or bath for months, she gets v cross however either of us approach it and probably also not cleaning teeth from breath. Any useful strategies please !!
She’s 80 and quite fit, cleaner (recently accepted as house was grubby) but no carer, Dad (80) and I are sure she’s had no shower or bath for months, she gets v cross however either of us approach it and probably also not cleaning teeth from breath. Any useful strategies please !!
I don't know what you're dealing with, Anthoula, but clearly not this issue, or incontinence. Be warned you may need a strong stomach as time goes on.
Well Slipstitch, we are all different and our tolerance levels are also different. What one can contend with another can not.
